(Rated G)
Notes: sequel to "Jim's Bumperstickers". Special thanks to Sister Patt
for agreeing to share this snippet with hostess Tricia.
After admiring the assortment of bumperstickers that Blair had given Jim, Simon asked him to compose several for the Major Crimes personnel.
Several days later, Blair (clichedly) bounced through the doors of Major Crimes with a stack of stickers. Waving them around, he announced, "Come one, come all, to sample Sandburg's Stickers!"
Simon called his people over to browse.
MAJOR CRIMES HOMICIDE DIVISION -----Our day starts when your's ends
BOMB SQUAD -----When it stops tickin', we take a lickin'
START A NEIGHBORHOOD WATCH -----Peek in your neighbor's window
Illegal sale of Viagra carries a STIFF penalty! Don't become a HARDENED criminal
CASCADE HARBOR PATROL -----Because boats float and bodies don't
SO MANY STUPID PEOPLE -----so few jail cells
IF YOU DRINK WHILE DRIVING -----we'll provide the Chaser
WE RISK OUR ASS -----to protect yours
PIG -----Pride. Integrity. Guts.
Female Cops Have Larger BUSTS!
Driver carries only $20.00 -----worth of AMMUNITION
And at the very bottom.
WANT TO FEEL SAFE -----SLEEP WITH A COP!
"Sand--BURG!" Simon yelled, making the windows vibrate and causing human beings to cringe.
"Sandy, Oh!" murmurred Megan, fingering the busty sticker.
"Blair," said Joel, patting him on the shoulder, thanking him on behalf of the C. B. S.
"Hairboy!" Rafe and H burst out as one, flipping through the piles.
Rafe snickered at the Neighborhood paper, and Henri guffawed at PIG.
The room grew quieter as Blair faced his lover. "Jim?" and he waited anxiously for a reaction.
Ellison, turning back to his desk, grinned. "Darwin, we gotta get back to work."
When Blair sat next to him at their desk, he tapped him on the chin with a pencil. Jim whispered to his lover, "Wanna put that last bumpersticker on the Volvo, Chief?"
The Sticky End.