Work Text:
The Gargle Game
by Lynneste
Chet Kelly was mixing vinegar and soybean oil. He and Johnny Gage were being challenged by Roy DeSoto on which fluid could be better for gargling to cure a sore throat. Roy came into the kitchen. He began to mix salt and warm water.
Chet asked, "Roy, remember when you were in the locker room at the station, gargling your mixture of salt and water?"
Roy replied, "Yeah, I remember. I never meant to get defensive about what made me want to gargle."
"That's alright. Johnny finally persuaded you to see Dr. Early."
"I'm grateful for that. My throat would've gotten worse if it weren't for Johnny's persuasion."
Johnny came into the kitchen.
He said, "Roy, I thank you for your taking my advice to see Dr. Early when your throat was bugging you."
Roy said, "Johnny, you have no idea how grateful I am for that."
Johnny said, "Alright. So I hope we're still on for this gargle game."
Chet said, "We still are. Roy and I were just mixing our fluids to gargle with."
Roy said, "That's right. I have warm salt water. Chet has vinegar and soybean oil."
Chet said, "That's right. We hope you have your fluid to gargle with."
Johnny said, "I can fix up some cayenne, lemon juice and lime juice."
Chet asked, "Will that take long?"
Johnny replied, "No, not at all."
Roy said, "Alright."
A few minutes later, the three men were in the bathroom.
Roy asked, "Are we ready?"
Chet said, "I believe so."
Johnny said, "Alright. Here goes nothing."
The three men took sips and gargled simultaneously for thirty seconds, then spit the fluids in the sink.
Chet asked, "Would you care to test the vinegar and soybean oil?"
Roy replied, "Sure."
Johnny replied, "Alright."
Chet shared the vinegar and soybean oil with Johnny and Roy, who both gargled the fluid simultaneously for thirty seconds, then spit it in the sink.
Johnny said, "Try the cayenne, lemon juice and lime juice."
Roy said, "Sure."
Chet said, "Alright."
Johnny shared the cayenne, lemon juice and lime juice with Roy and Chet, who both gargled the fluid simultaneously for thirty seconds, then spit it in the sink.
Roy asked, "Would you like to try the salt water?"
Johnny replied, "Sure."
Chet replied, "Alright."
Roy shared the salt water with Chet and Johnny, who both gargled the fluid simultaneously for thirty seconds, then spit it in the sink.
Johnny said, "We've tried gargling one another's fluids. So let's stick to our choices."
Roy said, "Good idea."
Chet said, "You're right."
So the three men gargled their original fluids again simultaneously for thirty seconds, then spit them in the sink. Johnny suddenly remembered he also brewed some mint tea for him, Roy and Chet to gargle with. So he went to the kitchen to get it.
A minute later, Johnny came back to the bathroom with the mint tea.
He said, "I brewed this mint tea for us to gargle with."
Chet asked, "Why do we need to gargle with mint tea?"
Roy replied, "We should get rid of the bitter taste in our throats. So Johnny thought mint tea would do the trick."
The three men took sips and gargled simultaneously for one minute, then spit the fluid in the sink.
A few minutes later, the three men were in each other's arms in their queen-size bed. Chet was on Roy's right. Johnny was on Roy's left. A celtic quilt warmed them up a little.
Roy said, "Now that we have the gargle game out of the way, let's get some shut-eye."
Chet said, "Good idea."
Johnny said, "I'm all for it."
The three men said their goodnights and I love yous to one another and then fell asleep.
DONE