Xander's Folly by Kate R
Author's Notes:
Disclaimer: Joss owns Buffy et al, Hamilton owns the Anita/Merry Gentry characters et al.
Rating: FR-15-21 for swearing and violence
Pairings: N/A at this time
Notes: If Xander Harris can do no wrong in your eyes or you like turning a joke and a fool into a hero (I don't, hence how I phrased that), read no further. Trust me, this story is NOT for you. You have been warned. For those who say Xander couldn't have summoned Sweet because he has no magic? I point you at Superstar: "Don't Speak Latin in Front of the Books, Xander." He very well could have read from a book to call Sweet, just as he reads from a book in this fic. It is canon. Sorry if you think it should be ignored in Xander's case, I don't. If you read and flame, they will be ignored.Everyone else, enjoy.
Rating: FR-15-21 for swearing and violence
Pairings: N/A at this time
Notes: If Xander Harris can do no wrong in your eyes or you like turning a joke and a fool into a hero (I don't, hence how I phrased that), read no further. Trust me, this story is NOT for you. You have been warned. For those who say Xander couldn't have summoned Sweet because he has no magic? I point you at Superstar: "Don't Speak Latin in Front of the Books, Xander." He very well could have read from a book to call Sweet, just as he reads from a book in this fic. It is canon. Sorry if you think it should be ignored in Xander's case, I don't. If you read and flame, they will be ignored.Everyone else, enjoy.
Xander's Folly
by Kate R.
"Damn it, I'm tired of this!"
Xander Harris watched Buffy Summers, his Dream Girl, his secret fantasy, his reason for fighting vampires other than that the monsters killed his Jesse, his other fantasy if he wanted to be honest with himself, which he didn't because that would mean he had to face he really was 'nothing special' and a joke, have a beauty of a melt down after another night of slaying, another night of ruined clothes and ruined dinner and ruined life. He watched her turn and storm off, rage flowing behind her. She pushed Dawn as she passed, knocking her younger sister into the wall, and Xander just watched.
"B-Buffy . . ." Dawn stammered.
"Stay away from me," Buffy growled, "I don't need you and your needs any more than I need another stupid vampire coming out of the ground!"
Dawn sat on the floor hard and Xander walked passed her, going after Buffy.
"Should learn to stay out of her way, Dawn," he told her, "She's the Slayer, she doesn’t really have time for being a mom or sister. You're a big girl now, you don't need her to be your baby sitter."
And then he left. He went to the Magic Box, where the Books Giles told him, specifically, not to read, not to speak Latin in front of, ever, lived. He knew the answer for how to make things easy for Buffy exited and he bet Giles' books had the answer. Of course Giles had the answer, he just didn't want to share it. He was a Watcher and the Watchers always kept the Slayer as pets. He thought Giles was different but apparently he wasn't. he said Buffy had to learn to do things on her own, learn to run her own life, and then he left. He ran off and left Buffy to the sharks.
"We'll just see about that," Xander muttered as he found the book. He knew it was the book he read from, he just knew it because Giles wouldn't let any of them read it, not even Willow.
"Here it is," he muttered as he found what he wanted, "Come on, I made you work once before."
He read the spell, not Latin this time but he could read it, somehow, and so he did:
"Anseo dom, Gods na Sean-agus Intercede ar son an ghlao amháin mé do chumhacht do! Ordú mé tú deontas Mo Slayer a Síochána, a thabhairt di faoiseamh ó ualach seo, deontas a Saoil gnáth éilimh sí. A dhéanamh saor in aisce ar an ualach agus deontas a saoirse as a meáchan! an ordaithe I leat, Oh, Gods! t-éileamh seo mé! "
He felt the snap of magic that told him the spell completed and he smiled.
"You owe her," he whispered, "For making those inhuman things to begin with!"
He went home to bed then, not knowing or caring exactly how his spell would be carried out, only knowing he got results with it.
Buffy would be so pleased. Pleased enough to pick him, maybe, when she found out he gave her her perfect and normal life . . .
Translation from Irish/Gaelic: "Here me, Gods of Old and Intercede on behalf of the one I call your power for! I command you grant My Slayer her Peace, give her relief from this burden, grant her the normal Life she demands. make her free of this burden and grant her freedom from her weight! This I command of you, Oh, Gods! This I demand!"
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
He woke the next morning to Anya freaking out, screaming something about the world going mad.
"What is wrong with you, Ahn?" He called, grabbing her shoulders and shaking her a little when her hysteria didn't abate.
"Buffy called," Anya babbled, "She's freaking out because she doesn't have her Slayer abilities anymore but Spike is still around only he's not normal either."
"What do you mean, is Fangless still bothering her?"
"He's not fangless and he doesn't have a demon face any more," Anya babbled, "He said he woke up a 'real vampire' like what he was before wasn't?"
"What did Giles say?"
"Nothing yet, we have to go to the Magic Box, but he'd make some calls," Anya's babble continued through his shower and the walk to the Magic Box. He didn't realize until they got there that something outside changed. The weather felt like winter in a state that actually had winter.
Entering the Magic Box, he froze. He'd forgotten to put the book away last night and Giles looked like he knew a spell was cast.
"Hey, G-Ma . . ."
The look Giles gave him quelled him and made him sit down.
"This morning," Giles began, as Xander realized he and Anya arrived last, "Spike came to me and said something changed. I looked outside and realized that he spoke the truth only it's not just some 'thing' that changed, it's everything. I came here, thinking one of my books might hold a prophecy or some such that we missed in our research, and I found this book opened to this page. Now, this book could have been used by even those magically null person because, like the summoning of sweet, it doesn't require power, merely the words to be read. Yes, Xander, that is why I told Willow and Buffy both that you did not lie to cover for Dawn, as your looks tried to imply. I knew that Spell, as Anya did, only required you say the words. Sweet would go for whoever had the necklace, not the person who summoned because normally Sweet was summoned to get rid of someone some female held jealousy towards. Regardless, when I found this books and the spell read, I added up things changing and realized the person got exactly what they wanted, although, as they demanded, I am sure as no altar preparation took place and no offerings were left out, the ones invoked decided to grant the caster's request. But, as faerie does if an adult by physical years that is not mentally retarded dares demand anything of them, they granted the wish to the letter, but not how the caster wanted it."
"What does that mean, Giles?" Dawn asked, and she sat away from Buffy, a bruise showing from where she'd hit the wall last night.
"It means, Dawn, this book knew what the Caster wanted and so laid out the spell to give it. And, if he or she asked it politely instead of demanding like a two year old, perhaps what the caster wanted would be given the way they wanted it. This spell reflects the tone of the person, if they read it belligerently; the book would add a word like 'demand' as that is exactly what the caster thought. As for how the Fey granted the demand? The caster wanted Buffy to not have to be the Slayer any longer, therefore, she is not. We are in a world where the Slayer is not needed."
"No vampires?" Xander spoke, almost an assumption.
"Oh, there are vampires, Xander," Giles told him, "But they all have civil rights and they police themselves. Also, this world knows of the existence of magic, and werewolves and other shifters. Since the vampires have rights, and there are legal executioners, the Slayer is not needed. Therefore the Slayer Power does not exist. Buffy is a normal woman here. From what I understand, from what little I've found via the 'Net, the Slayer would not be able to touch the vampires here even if they didn't have rights."
"They hide?" Willow asked.
"No," Giles answered, "They have more power than any one of you could hope to understand. By the way, as I am certain you noticed we no longer live in California."
"Where are we then?" Anya asked.
"St. Louis," Giles answered, "I discovered this by the paper on my front door step this morning."
"I can fix this," Willow spoke up.
"No, Willow, you can't," Giles told her, "Deities did this, not a normal spell. That and in this world, your magic won't be what it was. There is no Hellmouth here for you to feed off."
"What?!" Willow shrieked, "No! Fix this Giles! I mean it!"
She raised her hand to begin a spell and a gun clicked behind her head.
"Say those words," a female voice hissed in her ear, "Cast that spell, and it's a death sentence for you, tainted one."
"I can use my magic however I want!" Willow argued.
"And what sort of self entitled home-school did you learn that in," the voice responded, "Using magic to harm someone is an automatic death sentence. No trial, no jury, no judge. You cast that spell and I will blow your brains out because I am a federal agent and I do have legal permission to shoot you down if you do."
"May I ask your name?" Giles asked after Willow lowered her hand.
"Anita Blake," the voice answered, "Jean-Claude sensed you all on waking and asked me to check you out. I don't know where you're from and really, I don't care. You're in our world now and our laws apply. And no, there is no learning curve. You break the law, you buy it. I recognize Anyankah from my books on demonology and she better hope and pray no one else around here took those classes because there is a death sentence on her."
"Why don't you kill her then," Buffy asked, "Afraid you'll kill an innocent?"
"There's nothing innocent about a brat who sells her soul because her boyfriend chose another," Anita told them all, "The reason I won't kill her is because the worse punishment is to live as a human and have nothing. She can't own anything here because she'll be hunted down and killed if her name appears anywhere on any form. She can't work for the same reason."
"What if she doesn't use that name?" Xander asked.
"Anyone with even a hint of psychic ability will see her true name on anything she signs even with her fake one in place," Anita told them, "Most businesses have psychics on staff to see that sort of thing. You wanted a world where your friend wasn't the Slayer, you got it. I hope you enjoy living in it."
She looked at Xander as she spoke and Giles raised his hand.
"Yes?" She asked.
"Why are you looking at Xander?"
"Because I can read magic," Anita told him, "And I can trace it back to the one who did it. The magic glow from that book surrounds him. He's your caster. There's another three or four he did, that I'll wager were granted in ways he didn't like so he assumed it failed. The most recently cast spell for a demon that knows if it dares come here will be hunted down and butchered by Demon Hunters. He better be glad he cast that one wherever you came from because if he did it here, he'd be dead, too. That spell kills people, after all."
"He didn't know people would die!" Buffy yelled.
'Then he's either an idiot or an arrogant fool," Anita returned, "Because the word 'demon' never implies anything good if you have to 'summon' it. If he doesn’t speak the language, he shouldn't go reading strange spells. Like the permanent and undoable one that I guess brought you all here."
"The book tricked him!" Willow spoke up.
"It's a book," Anita told her, "It doesn't have a life force or a conscious will, just magic to give its reader what that reader wants. He 'wanted' a spell that could make things as he wanted them to be. The exact words, if I read that right, Mr. Giles, is it? Are: 'Here me, Gods of Old and Intercede on behalf of the one I call your power for. I command you grant My Slayer her peace, give her relief from this burden, grant her the normal life she demands. Make her free of her burden and grant her freedom from her weight. This I command of you, Oh, Gods. This I demand.' He got what he wanted, she's not The Slayer, whatever nonhuman thing that is, any more, her burden f her younger sister, I'm guessing, will be taken care of by social services visiting your house and auditing your bank account to see if you can even provide for her. Vampires do a better job of policing themselves than even the preternatural investigators do so normally we leave it to them anyhow, no need for her, again. And, if any killings leaked in to our world, she may well be on trial for murder. S he doesn’t have a badge and your tainted little friend there doesn’t have a license. No one here does but no one else threatened to harm another."
Xander cringed, backing up, bracing for what he knew was coming, and the girls didn't disappoint. Almost on cue, all of them, and Giles and Spike for a bonus, turned on him and he heard his name chorused by everyone:
"XANDER!"
end part 1