Chapter Fifteen:

From the nurses’ station Karen saw Gibbs arrive back in ICU carrying two cups of coffee. She met him at the door to the waiting room, reaching out her hand gratefully. “You’re a rock star!� she exclaimed, as she took a sip and gave an appreciative sigh. Gibbs looked at her quizzically, having never heard that expression before. Seeing the confusion on his face, and accurately guessing what had put it there, she laughed and said, “You need to get out more.�

“Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth,� Gibbs cautioned her. He liked her; she was feisty and quick. Talking with her pulled him out of his funk and made him feel better.

“If it looks like a duck, and walks like a duck� she said, raising her eyebrow.

“Believe nothing of what you hear and only half of what you see,� Gibbs quoted, enjoying the game they had fallen into.

Karen scrunched her face up as she thought, “A leopard can’t change its spots!� she crowed triumphantly, daring him to best her.

Of course Gibbs never backed down from a challenge. Looking at him, she could tell he was running her last saying back through his head. Then he smiled, which had been her objective all along, and said, “After dark all cats are leopards.�

With that, Karen held up both hands to signal her surrender. “I need to get back to it. Thanks for the coffee,� she said, and then looked at her watch. As she turned to leave, he heard her say, “You can see him in twenty minutes.�

When he walked into the waiting room he saw that Ducky was awake and was busy telling a story to a family member of some other patient. The man Ducky was talking to had a glazed expression on his face, and was clearly only half heartedly listening. Taking mercy on him, Gibbs said, “Duck, could I speak with you for a moment,� and he inclined his head, indicating that they should move to the chairs across the room.

“Of course, Jethro,� and turning back to the man he said, “Please excuse me, duty calls. I do hope your grandfather will be alright. Perhaps we will have the opportunity to speak again.�

Ducky stood and followed Gibbs. “I’m glad to see you looking better, Jethro.�

Gibbs nodded to acknowledge Ducky’s statement. Looking at him, he realized that Ducky was showing every one of his years. “You should go home Duck. There’s no reason for us both to spend the night here and I’m not leaving.� The last bit was said with a hint of defiance.

“I never dreamed you would. I hate to leave you alone, Jethro. Now that Mother’s not living at the home I don’t need to hurry off.�

“It’s getting late Ducky. Tony isn’t likely to wake up tonight and he’s being well taken care of. Go home and get some sleep in your own bed. There’s no reason for us both to spend the night in recliners.� Sensing that Ducky was about to offer up more protest, he added, “If you wanted to do me a favor you could swing by my house in the morning and pick up some clean clothes and some toiletries,� knowing this would provide Ducky with a much needed mission.

“As you wish. I must admit my old bones will thank you in the morning. Don’t hesitate to call me if there is any change. I can be back here in twenty minutes.“ Looking at Gibbs, as he stood, he said, “Do try to get more sleep Jethro. I know sleeping the night away in fifty minute increments isn’t ideal, but neither is operating with no rest.�

“Will do Duck. Don’t worry, I don’t think Nurse Karen will let me get too out of hand.�

Grinning widely, Ducky said, “You might be right about that. I think you may have met your match there; she reminds me of you, Jethro â€" although a much more pleasant version to look at, of course,â€� and with that, he turned to leave.

Easing down into a chair, Gibbs glanced at his watch. 9:45; this was turning out to be one of the longest days of his life. Casting his eyes around the room he studied the other people waiting to see loved ones. Their faces all wore similar expressions, a mix between fear and hope. Gibbs didn’t kid himself; he knew he looked the same way. Fifteen more minutes before they would be allowed in to the ICU. He wished he could find something to do to distract himself. He didn’t want to allow himself to fall back into the retrospection he had been indulging in. It made him uncomfortable and he couldn’t act on any of the revelations he had discovered now anyway.

As a way of diverting his wayward thoughts, he forced himself to think about the investigation. They knew that Tony had followed up on a lead Friday night. He made a mental note to ask McGee if they had found out anything more about how Tony caught the lead. Somehow Tony managed to get himself captured, assumedly by Lynch, as it was his fingerprints found on the bat and chair. They were all well aware of what happened to Tony after that. He pulled his straying mind back to his present analysis; it would do no good to dwell on Tony’s injuries. They had located Tony because of an address scribbled on a piece of paper found in the backpack Tony had left in his car. He thought about how Ziva and McGee had surreptitiously gotten the prints to Abby and, after having them identified, had decided to chase down Lynch on their own. What had they intended to do once they found him, he wondered, shaking his head in disbelief. Now they were parked outside a bar, waiting for Cassie’s team to come and take Lynch in for questioning. He hoped Cassie got the answers they needed. Why had Tony gone to the warehouse? What case did it relate to? Who was Lynch, and why had he taken Tony? What made him beat Tony to within an inch of his life? There were too many unanswered questions. He knew that Cassie was good, and that McGee and Ziva were very motivated, but the need to run the investigation was overwhelming. Gibbs was not good at relinquishing control; he would need to make sure that he got regular updates from Cassie. If she didn’t get the answers they needed, he would have a little private chat with Lynch, he promised himself. With that resolved he was feeling a little better when a nurse he had not seen before stuck her head in and said that they could come into the ICU.

He had just stepped in to Tony’s room when Karen came in. “Gibbs, Dr. Pitt just called. He’s had a patient take a bad turn and needs to stay at Bethesda longer. He said, and I quote, ‘Since my night is shot to hell anyway, I’ll probably stop by when I’m done here. Tell Gibbs to behave himself.’ I wonder why he felt that was necessary?� she asked sardonically.

Gibbs smirked at her, but said nothing. Then he remembered where he was and his eyes locked on to Tony.

“Remember what you said earlier Gibbs. Believe nothing that you hear, and only half of what you see,� and giving him a reassuring pat, she went back to her duties.

Tony seemed to be a bit restless. His head was moving from side to side, and the cooling blankets, which had been gone for his last visit, were back. There was a soft sheen to his face, and Gibbs knew that the fever was still a problem. Gibbs reached over to the table sitting next to the ventilator, and lifted up a cloth which sat next to a bowl of water. After dipping the cloth in the water and squeezing out the excess, he gently bathed Tony’s face with it.

“Hey Tony, it’s me, Gibbs. You’re doing great Tony. You just need to keep fighting. You’ll be out of here before you know it.� His task completed, he put the cloth back on the table and reached out to touch Tony’s face. It felt hot to the touch. He ran his hand down Tony’s cheek, feeling soft skin and the faint scrape of beard. Studying Tony’s face he was troubled to see small beads of sweat already reforming on his forehead. Using his hand, he brushed them away. “When you feel better I’ll tell you about Ziva and McGee’s stab at undercover work. I’m not sure McGee is fully recovered.� He paused, thinking about what to say. “Abby wants to come see you, but I told her to hold off. I’m not sure you’re up to a visit from her yet. You need to be able to defend yourself. She’s likely to tackle you when she sees you.� As he spoke, his other hand had gently encircled on of Tony’s. “Sent Ducky home for the night. He was done in. I expect he’ll be back first thing in the morning. Everyone’s pulling for you Tony. Don’t let them down, it’d piss me off DiNozzo,� and he gently caressed Tony’s face, to take the sting from his words. Just like last time, Tony turned his face into the touch, resting his cheek in Gibbs’ hand. “Yeah, I feel the same way, Tony,� he whispered.

Before he knew it, a nurse came in to tell him that he needed to let Tony rest again. After murmuring his good byes and promises to be back soon, Gibbs returned to the waiting room. As he sat, preparing to wait for another very long hour, he thought back on what Karen had said. ‘Believe nothing that you hear, and only half of what you see.’ She had no idea how well that saying applied to Tony. He knew she had meant that as a reassurance â€" a reminder that although Tony’s injuries were terrible, and that he looked weak he was silently fighting to get better. But thinking about the saying he realized it applied to so much more, where Tony was concerned. As a matter of fact, it summed up the public face of Tony. Most of what Tony said was bunk, half truths and feints, designed to keep people from digging too deeply. The bright, goofy smile Tony wore hid a sharp, analytical mind, and his carefree image prevented people from seeing that he could be hurt deeply. Hell, he thought, he had seen Tony on rare occasions with his mask ripped away, and yet he was lulled into accepting the person Tony offered to the world. Gibbs knew how hard it was to maintain a façade. He had been doing it for years. Never letting people know about Shannon and Kelly; never talking about the disintegration of his three, ill-advised subsequent marriages; never letting anyone too close, for fear they discover he wasn’t bullet proof. For the first time in years, he wanted to change that. He wanted to let Tony in, to drop his guard. He wanted Tony to feel comfortable enough with him to do the same. He didn’t want to be like Ducky, older and alone â€" living in a house filled with dogs, with no one to relax with at the end of a long day. He would make that happen, he promised himself. He just needed Tony to keep on fighting.