Your search turned up 3 hits Latin from Manhattan asks, I'm fascinated by the term and the concept of "le petit mort", where someone becomes so overwhelmed by the pleasure of sex that he/she loses consciousness. Is this more common among men or women? I'm planning to write a ST slash starring Picard/Riker where Picard succumbs to "le petit mort" when he climaxes, causing Riker to panic and think he's killed him. Since Picard has an artificial heart, would the symptoms of heart failure be similar to "le petit mort" (hence Riker's panic)? How long does the person remain unconscious? Would CPR help revive them, or would smelling salts do? How often DO people die of heart failure during sex, anyway? Are they usually older people with a previous history of heart trouble? Or younger people cheating on their spouses or lovers? (I understand guilt plays a big part in coital heart failure). Dear Latin from Manhattan, While "le petit mort" literally translates as "the little death", this is really a metaphorical and literary conceit. The experience of orgasm is being compared to that of dying - it doesn't really happen.While an orgasm can be intense, and some people may momentarily "gray out" during or afterwards, I have never heard of someone actually losing consciousness. I have known men that will immediately afterwards roll over and fall asleep like the dead... if the dead could snore. If they do pass out, it's much more likely to be the fault of alcohol, rather than "le petit mort".I don't know, and couldn't find, any statistics on heart failure during sex that looked trustworthy. But I would assume that if a person were to actually suffer a cardiac event during sex, smelling salts wouldn't do much good.I've also never heard that guilt plays any part in coital heart failure - this sounds like an urban legend to me, or a modern morality lesson. If a person's heart is strong, guilt won't make it any weaker. Stress is indeed a contributing factor in many heart attacks - but as a long-term thing, slowly weakening the heart and in general worsening the health. Yes, a person who's heart is already weak can be shocked into a heart attack, but I don't think the "guilt" of cheating on a spouse would have that kind of immediate jolting effect. -- Minotaur Linda asks, As in real life, sex is easy, romance is tough. Can you share with us your view of m/m romance? What do you consider an appropriate romantic gesture? Could you suggest some romantic gifts? How about pet names or terms of endearment?I am attempting to write what I hope will be a love story, and I don't want to "over-feminize" my characters by throwing in dippy drivel like flowers and poetry. So when two grown men are in love with each other, how do they really behave in the privacy of their own home? Dear Linda, This is a tough one to answer, as it really depends on the guys in question. Some people are more "romantic" than others, and what will melt one person's heart will end up in someone else's trash. Personally, I don't see the point of flowers. They die too quickly and don't really mean much to me. A nice dinner out at a good restaurant would be more my style. Teddy bears and stuffed animals would only receive my contempt (and then be given to the cat as a playtoy), but a good book would be read and maybe even treasured (especially if it were inscribed by the giver). Fandom related stuff would work, but then I'm fen - and most of our characters aren't.As for pet names, again that depends on the guys. I called my last boyfriend "bossy cow" - because he was. The current one gets called honey, and is often referred to in conversation as "the monster boyfriend" (jokingly, and with affection) or simply "the husband".The feminization thing is awkward - most slash readers are women, but the characters are guys. Some readers want more "realistic" portrayals, some want the guys written as they wish guys really were. We (guys, that is) do tend to be less demonstative, more subtle about our affections. The tone of voice and other non-verbal cues often mean more than the words themselves. We can say "I hate you" and mean "I love you more than life itself". So in writing "realisticaly" about a male/male relationship, my advice is "less is more". Be subtle, be understated, be clear. -- Minotaur NK asks, I've just recently really started writing slash, and I'm having a hard time figuring out how to describe the sex scenes in my stories. I keep trying to describe what's happening, and end up twitching so much that I have to skip around the details in order to get the scene over with. Do you have any pointers you can give me for describing what happens? Dear NK, If you don't feel comfortable writing explicit sex, or don't think you're ready as a writer, then don't. There are plenty of G or PG rated slash stories, and plenty others that draw the misty veil over the act itself. Better you should skip the details than force yourself to write something you aren't comfortable with, or that will not match up to the quality/tone of the rest of the story.Characterization, emotional integrity and quality of writing are the hallmarks of a good story (unless you're writing PWP's, then it's the nitty-gritty -grin-). Good sex bits are just icing on the cake. Learn to bake the best cake you can. -- Minotaur
Your search turned up 3 hits
Latin from Manhattan asks,
I'm fascinated by the term and the concept of "le petit mort", where someone becomes so overwhelmed by the pleasure of sex that he/she loses consciousness. Is this more common among men or women? I'm planning to write a ST slash starring Picard/Riker where Picard succumbs to "le petit mort" when he climaxes, causing Riker to panic and think he's killed him. Since Picard has an artificial heart, would the symptoms of heart failure be similar to "le petit mort" (hence Riker's panic)? How long does the person remain unconscious? Would CPR help revive them, or would smelling salts do? How often DO people die of heart failure during sex, anyway? Are they usually older people with a previous history of heart trouble? Or younger people cheating on their spouses or lovers? (I understand guilt plays a big part in coital heart failure).
Dear Latin from Manhattan,
While "le petit mort" literally translates as "the little death", this is really a metaphorical and literary conceit. The experience of orgasm is being compared to that of dying - it doesn't really happen.While an orgasm can be intense, and some people may momentarily "gray out" during or afterwards, I have never heard of someone actually losing consciousness. I have known men that will immediately afterwards roll over and fall asleep like the dead... if the dead could snore. If they do pass out, it's much more likely to be the fault of alcohol, rather than "le petit mort".I don't know, and couldn't find, any statistics on heart failure during sex that looked trustworthy. But I would assume that if a person were to actually suffer a cardiac event during sex, smelling salts wouldn't do much good.I've also never heard that guilt plays any part in coital heart failure - this sounds like an urban legend to me, or a modern morality lesson. If a person's heart is strong, guilt won't make it any weaker. Stress is indeed a contributing factor in many heart attacks - but as a long-term thing, slowly weakening the heart and in general worsening the health. Yes, a person who's heart is already weak can be shocked into a heart attack, but I don't think the "guilt" of cheating on a spouse would have that kind of immediate jolting effect.
While "le petit mort" literally translates as "the little death", this is really a metaphorical and literary conceit. The experience of orgasm is being compared to that of dying - it doesn't really happen.
While an orgasm can be intense, and some people may momentarily "gray out" during or afterwards, I have never heard of someone actually losing consciousness. I have known men that will immediately afterwards roll over and fall asleep like the dead... if the dead could snore. If they do pass out, it's much more likely to be the fault of alcohol, rather than "le petit mort".
I don't know, and couldn't find, any statistics on heart failure during sex that looked trustworthy. But I would assume that if a person were to actually suffer a cardiac event during sex, smelling salts wouldn't do much good.
I've also never heard that guilt plays any part in coital heart failure - this sounds like an urban legend to me, or a modern morality lesson. If a person's heart is strong, guilt won't make it any weaker. Stress is indeed a contributing factor in many heart attacks - but as a long-term thing, slowly weakening the heart and in general worsening the health. Yes, a person who's heart is already weak can be shocked into a heart attack, but I don't think the "guilt" of cheating on a spouse would have that kind of immediate jolting effect.
-- Minotaur
Linda asks,
As in real life, sex is easy, romance is tough. Can you share with us your view of m/m romance? What do you consider an appropriate romantic gesture? Could you suggest some romantic gifts? How about pet names or terms of endearment?I am attempting to write what I hope will be a love story, and I don't want to "over-feminize" my characters by throwing in dippy drivel like flowers and poetry. So when two grown men are in love with each other, how do they really behave in the privacy of their own home?
As in real life, sex is easy, romance is tough. Can you share with us your view of m/m romance? What do you consider an appropriate romantic gesture? Could you suggest some romantic gifts? How about pet names or terms of endearment?
I am attempting to write what I hope will be a love story, and I don't want to "over-feminize" my characters by throwing in dippy drivel like flowers and poetry. So when two grown men are in love with each other, how do they really behave in the privacy of their own home?
Dear Linda,
This is a tough one to answer, as it really depends on the guys in question. Some people are more "romantic" than others, and what will melt one person's heart will end up in someone else's trash. Personally, I don't see the point of flowers. They die too quickly and don't really mean much to me. A nice dinner out at a good restaurant would be more my style. Teddy bears and stuffed animals would only receive my contempt (and then be given to the cat as a playtoy), but a good book would be read and maybe even treasured (especially if it were inscribed by the giver). Fandom related stuff would work, but then I'm fen - and most of our characters aren't.As for pet names, again that depends on the guys. I called my last boyfriend "bossy cow" - because he was. The current one gets called honey, and is often referred to in conversation as "the monster boyfriend" (jokingly, and with affection) or simply "the husband".The feminization thing is awkward - most slash readers are women, but the characters are guys. Some readers want more "realistic" portrayals, some want the guys written as they wish guys really were. We (guys, that is) do tend to be less demonstative, more subtle about our affections. The tone of voice and other non-verbal cues often mean more than the words themselves. We can say "I hate you" and mean "I love you more than life itself". So in writing "realisticaly" about a male/male relationship, my advice is "less is more". Be subtle, be understated, be clear.
This is a tough one to answer, as it really depends on the guys in question. Some people are more "romantic" than others, and what will melt one person's heart will end up in someone else's trash. Personally, I don't see the point of flowers. They die too quickly and don't really mean much to me. A nice dinner out at a good restaurant would be more my style. Teddy bears and stuffed animals would only receive my contempt (and then be given to the cat as a playtoy), but a good book would be read and maybe even treasured (especially if it were inscribed by the giver). Fandom related stuff would work, but then I'm fen - and most of our characters aren't.
As for pet names, again that depends on the guys. I called my last boyfriend "bossy cow" - because he was. The current one gets called honey, and is often referred to in conversation as "the monster boyfriend" (jokingly, and with affection) or simply "the husband".
The feminization thing is awkward - most slash readers are women, but the characters are guys. Some readers want more "realistic" portrayals, some want the guys written as they wish guys really were. We (guys, that is) do tend to be less demonstative, more subtle about our affections. The tone of voice and other non-verbal cues often mean more than the words themselves. We can say "I hate you" and mean "I love you more than life itself". So in writing "realisticaly" about a male/male relationship, my advice is "less is more". Be subtle, be understated, be clear.
NK asks,
I've just recently really started writing slash, and I'm having a hard time figuring out how to describe the sex scenes in my stories. I keep trying to describe what's happening, and end up twitching so much that I have to skip around the details in order to get the scene over with. Do you have any pointers you can give me for describing what happens?
Dear NK,
If you don't feel comfortable writing explicit sex, or don't think you're ready as a writer, then don't. There are plenty of G or PG rated slash stories, and plenty others that draw the misty veil over the act itself. Better you should skip the details than force yourself to write something you aren't comfortable with, or that will not match up to the quality/tone of the rest of the story.Characterization, emotional integrity and quality of writing are the hallmarks of a good story (unless you're writing PWP's, then it's the nitty-gritty -grin-). Good sex bits are just icing on the cake. Learn to bake the best cake you can.
If you don't feel comfortable writing explicit sex, or don't think you're ready as a writer, then don't. There are plenty of G or PG rated slash stories, and plenty others that draw the misty veil over the act itself. Better you should skip the details than force yourself to write something you aren't comfortable with, or that will not match up to the quality/tone of the rest of the story.
Characterization, emotional integrity and quality of writing are the hallmarks of a good story (unless you're writing PWP's, then it's the nitty-gritty -grin-). Good sex bits are just icing on the cake. Learn to bake the best cake you can.
