Goodbye Isn't Forever
Know, Eldarion, that men will die in your service, even if you wish they
would not. You cannot stop death. I know. I have often tried.
And at times you're going to have to be hard. Men will rely on you to make
decisions. They will go to you for justice. And justice you must provide,
even if every part of you screams when you do it.
My son, know that you can never be truly happy while wearing the crown. It
sets you apart, makes you different than everyone around you, even the men
with whom you grew up. Breaking those boundaries can spell only ruin.
As king, you will never have a moment's rest. Everything, everything, that
reaches you desk will be a crisis. If it wasn't, it wouldn't be on your
desk. Troubles are passed up the line, while the small fires are quenched by
the secretaries. That's what they're there for.
As a leader of men, there are certain things you must do. One is take a
wife. I know this is no hardship for you as you are already married, but it
was for me. I was engaged once. An elven lady, she was. Daughter of the
Elven lord who raised me. It was not to be. Your mother, a member of my
court, consented to have me when no one else would. It is not such a trying
thing, to be Queen, but it is hard when your King calls out a man's name in
bed.
Shh, Eldarion, don't quiet me. These are things you must know. I am not some
raving old fool, not yet. I will save that for my last moments in life, when
I will hallucinate that I see my Boromir standing there to greet me and
welcome me. I will rave then, and for good reason. It has been over a
hundred years since I saw my love.
Long life is a curse, Eldarion, never think otherwise. It is an affliction.
Men were not meant to live so long. Men were not meant to live through so
much pain. Our bloodline, yours and mine, will mean that you will outlast
your Queen and all your friends. It is a curse, Eldarion, and nothing more.
Teach your sons well, but don't be too hard on them. Give them time to be
children, as I gave you time and as I was given. Don't name any after me,
but if you feel you must, name him Estel. That was the name by which my
Boromir first knew me. I told him the elves called me Estel. It was an elf
that told him my right name.
No, I'm not raving yet, dear Eldarion. But this is not so hard, is it? To
sit by your father's sarcophagus and wait for him to let his life leave his
body. I've surrendered the crown already, yes? Two hundred years, and my
memory is beginning to fail. Ah, I knew I did. And the scepter, too. Don't
expect me to call you 'king', you young rascal. I remember you before you
could even walk.
Eldarion, my son, listen to me. You must hear. I've spend a lifetime
governing men. I made mistakes. I made bad decisions. I've chosen the wrong
course of action. I've reacted in anger. I've lost my temper.
All these things, they can never be remedied, but you must try to keep them
to a minimum. You are a king of men, not their tormenter. Remember that,
Eldarion. You are a king of men.
Your mother? You want me to tell you about your mother? Why? I didn't love
her. I felt an amazing amount of gratitude that such a lovely thing would
marry a man who freely admitted he could never love her. Your mother was a
jewel, a paragon of women everywhere. But I never loved her.
Did you assume I did? That since you love your Queen that I must have loved
mine? Oh, dear Eldarion, so old, yet so young. Go to the library when next
you have a chance. Look for the chronologies of the Steward line and trace
your finger down to Boromir, son of Denethor, the second one to bear that
name. Then you will know who it was that I loved.
What did he look like? Oh, he was beautiful, but as men are beautiful. He
was a wonderful swordsman. He was tender, gentle, and the most ruthless man
I had ever met. And he loved me. Unconditionally.
I was never king to him, not until the end. At the end he told me what I had
always known. And then he died in my arms.
Shh, Eldarion, those are just tears. Even now it pains me to think of those
moments. He had three Orc arrows in his chest. Three arrows and still he
stood to fight. The number of Orcs he killed was uncountable. All to defend
two small Halflings. My Boromir was a huge man, strong and powerful. Even
that third arrow did not kill him immediately. There was enough time left
for him to die in my arms.
You mother knew, of course. I explained it all to her. She would hear none
of my recriminations. It was not my fault he died, she said again and again.
I could not have been in two places at once.
Though I will tell you now a secret I never told her. Were it not for me,
Boromir would never have left camp that day, to go to his end. I quarreled
with him. I insulted him. He thought he had no other choice but to leave me
and try to make his own fate. He thought I had made my choice, and that he
alone could save the world of men.
Oh, Eldarion, I know. If it was intended that he die that day on Amon Hen, I
could not have stopped it. That does not stop the dreams, of course.
It is strange, I suppose. It has been a hundred years and I can still
remember his voice. I can still remember his face. I can still remember
every single thing about him.
I miss him. Terribly. But I have done as he wished and saved the world of
men. I have made it so that Minas Tirith can never fall. I have made his
City great again.
Oh, Eldarion, I can see him now. He is standing next to you, smiling at me.
One arm is out and extended to me. He is dressed in his old uniform - he was
Captain of Gondor's Armies and Marshal of the White Tower, did I tell you? -
though his gauntlets are missing. I took them from his body after he died.
They lie in state in my quarters, next to a small portrait of him. Promise
me you'll tend to them, Eldarion. Don't let them grow frail with age.
Oh, my son, he is so beautiful. So much more than I remember. I must go to
him. I must join him. He is beckoning for me to join him. He has waited so
long for me. I must go to him.
Farewell, my son. Do not mourn for me. I am going to joy.
Companion piece
And if you chance upon the son of the Steward on a fair night, you may even
see his companion, for the High King himself joins his lover nightly, to
watch over their entwined bodies and borders. Eldarion himself has ordered
this, and his orders have been obeyed. The High King Elessar was set adrift
to find the flowing sea and found his love instead.
by Lanna Michaels
isten, my son. I am leaving this world soon, and there is still much you
need to know. So much you must learn to be a king of men.
He Will Stay 'Till You Come
f you follow the Anduin to where it flows into the Sea, if you watch
carefully at deep midnight, you may see Boromir of Gondor, standing guard on
the Western shore. His body lies in state on a gently rocking boat,
surrounded by the trophies of the enemies he fought. The shadow of the
warrior may lead you there, if you are lucky. And if you know your tales
well, you might even make out the outline of the ghost of his cloven horn,
returned to him now in death, at his hip as he walks.
