THE BLTS Archive - Tangled Web: The Bad
by Yvette (yvette@ecn.net.au)

---

Tuvok watched Harry his quarters leaving with regret. It seemed there
was no end to the mistakes he had made in  trying to be with Harry. If
he lost Harry because of his errors . . . he didn't even want to think
about the end of that sentence. The feeling of immense loneliness was
already so palpable it would serve no logical purpose to dwell on how
much worse things would be if he and Harry couldn't be together.

---

Harry buzzed at the entrance to Tom's quarters again. Why the hell
wasn't Tom answering? Beginning to get alarmed, Harry considered his
options briefly. There was no law that said Tom had to answer his
door, but he'd been pretty upset, and God only knew what Tom would do
in that condition.

He had a choice now - Tuvok or Chakotay. Either one had the authority
to override the lock on Tom's door and let Harry check on Tom. Harry
was loathe to bring the First Officer into this, but Tom would be
humiliated if Tuvok was the one who had to release the security lock
out on his door. *If* he was doing something to himself, that is.
Harry buzzed again, frustrated, only to get no response.

Finally, he made a decision and hit his comm badge.

"Kim to Chakotay."

There was a momentary pause before Chakotay's voice came over the
comm channel.

"Chakotay here. What do you need, Ensign"

"Chakotay - I'm a little worried about Tom. He's not answering his
door. Could you possibly release the security lockout so I can check
on him?" Harry felt doubly stupid as he spoke his request out loud.
Tom was probably asleep - or just ignoring him. Chakotay would
probably go ballistic.

Surprisingly, the First Officer didn't demand an explanation.
"I'm on my way."

Well, Tom would surely kill him for embarrassing him like this. At
least he wouldn't have to decide whether or not to continue seeing
Tuvok.

Minutes later, Chakotay stepped out of the turbolift and walked
towards Harry. His features showed concern as he neared the Ensign,
and Harry squared his shoulders mentally, braced for the inquisition.

Chakotay just stood, watching him for a moment, before asking, "How
many times have you buzzed?"

Taken aback by the question, Harry thought for a second. "Four times
now. I've been standing here for ten minutes."

Chakotay just nodded, thoughtfully. "Computer, release the security
lockout from Lieutenant Paris' door, authorisation Chakotay Alpha
Omega Three."

The door slid open. No Tom Paris appeared, angry, humiliated or
otherwise. Harry's misgivings returned in full force as he entered
Tom's quarters. A quick look in the bedroom showed no sign of Tom.
Chakotay went into the  bathroom, and his voice was heard seconds
later.

"Computer! Beam Lieutenant Paris to the sickbay immediately - medical
emergency!" Harry raced to the bathroom in time to see Tom, slumped
on the floor, covered in blood that gushed from gashes on his wrists
and legs, before he was covered in a shower of sparkles and beamed
to sickbay.

"Oh, my God." He could only stare, horrified, at the blood on the
floor. It was everywhere.

Chakotay grabbed his arm and practically dragged him out of Tom's
quarters to the turbolift.

"You can tell me what the hell happened here on the way to sickbay,
Ensign Kim."

---

Tom was released from sickbay three days later. He was on 'medical
probation' until he could be declared fit for duty. Chakotay was
counselling him. The problems between Harry and Tuvok had
intensified after Tom's suicide attempt. Tuvok was furious at the
highly emotional, attention-seeking ploy and refused to see Tom,
despite numerous requests from the Pilot while he was in sickbay.

And Tuvok's attitude towards Tom wasn't helping his relationship with
Harry any. They snatched short amounts of time together here and
there, but with the ship's rumour mill doing overtime it was hard to
get time alone together without it getting back to Tom.

The crew's sympathy was with Tom, and it didn't help that Harry felt
like a murderer every moment he spent with Tuvok. The Vulcan had no
sympathy whatsoever for Tom, and Tom's continued interference in
Tuvok's relationship with Harry was making him dislike the Pilot even
more. Tom seemed to realise he wasn't getting Tuvok's attention, so
he did the next best thing. He got Harry's. Harry was on call 24
hours a day, for when Tom wanted to talk, or go to Sandrine's for the
first time since the suicide attempt, or just have company for
dinner.

Harry knew that Chakotay would love to spend the time with Tom, but
Tom was so obsessive about Tuvok he couldn't consider being with
anyone else. Eventually, Tom got his way, in a manner of speaking.
Harry split up with Tuvok. Tuvok spent weeks trying to convince Harry
otherwise, but ultimately settled for friendship. It was better than
nothing.

Despite everything that had happened, Tom and Harry's friendship
stayed strong. Tom occasionally felt guilty knowing how torn Harry
felt, but he could cope with that. At least Tuvok wasn't with anyone
else.

Tuvok returned to the intense loneliness he had felt before falling
in love with Harry. He watched over the Ensign as best he could from
a distance, grateful for the few hours each week that Harry spent
with him, playing Kal-toh or just talking. He silently rued the day
he had ever met Tom Paris.

And Harry? Harry eventually married Sam Wildman. He'd always felt a
special affinity with Sam's daughter Naomi - after all, they were
from the same universe. He didn't love Sam, but he couldn't have
Tuvok and he didn't want Tom. Tuvok's Pon farr was less than a year
away when Harry married Sam, but he knew he would be Tuvok's mate
throughout his time. If Tom went off the deep end, so be it.
Friendship with Tom Paris carried a heavy price sometimes.

---

The End