The BLTS Archive- Integration and Revelations
by Riss (usc_mam@yahoo.com)

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Thanks to my beta readers Jan & Jan you were both a great help!  This
is the fifth story of my Philosophy of the Mind series.  None of the
previous stories are required to understand this one, but I'd love if
you want to read them :-)

I know this isn't my promised P/7 story, but I've been a little busy.
Maybe I'll start on it over Thanksgiving...  I do have the next one of
this series about ready to go, so you might see it up in the next week
or two.

Disclaimers:  Voyager and all its characters are owned lock, stock and
barrel by Paramount and its parent Viacom.  I'm just taking them out
for a little spin.  I promise to have them back by midnight, without
trying to make any money off of them.

Go ahead and send to BLTS and archive in ASC

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I am Seven of Nine, Tertiary Adjunct to the Unimatrix 01, but now I am
alone.  I have been a member of the Voyager crew for more than a year
now.  A year of learning to be an individual.  A year of only hearing
one voice in my head.  At first, it was difficult, since the voices
kept me company.  Life alone seemed futile and irrelevant.  Now, I am
beginning to appreciate the silence.  My resistance has been futile.

Life has not always been easy for me on Voyager.  However, the
assistance I have received from five members of this crew has been
invaluable.  When I was a drone, assistance came in the form of the
collective.  While Captain Janeway calls Voyager a small collective,
the ideas and assistance are individual.

The Doctor, despite my initial uncertainty towards him for removing my
Borg identity, has proven to be a great help in integrating into this
crew.  Himself an outsider and a program, he has attempted to instruct
me in what he has learned of Voyager's ways.	His course in human
interaction, which I initially considered irrelevant and superfluous,
has provided much insight into social interactions and irrelevant,
meaningless conversation.

Lieutenant Commander Tuvok has also assisted in my integration.  Also
an outsider on Voyager, he has provided a logical course for me to
follow.  His Vulcan thought processes are the most efficient and his
lack of emotional involvement mirrors my own situation at times.

Another person I consider my friend on Voyager is Ensign Kim.  I have
read much literature on the subject of love in an effort to understand
him. When he refused my offer of copulation, Commander Chakotay
suggested I examine that literature.  While references to sparks seem
out of place in human interactions, I believe I have begun to
understand the term lust.  I also was intrigued by the references to
clothing in attracting one's mate.  I changed my attire from the brown
jumpsuit to the blue one since the literature emphasized the need for
an appealing appearance.  Prior to today's events, much of my
contemplation of life has revolved around the Ensign.

The man I considered my first friend on Voyager is Lieutenant Paris.
Only months after his offer of friendship after the incident with the
Kaatati, did I finally understand what he was offering at that time.
After researching his background, I believe we are also similar.
Unlike the doctor and Tuvok who have always been outsiders, both
Lieutenant Paris and I are humans who have been outside acceptable
society, he in prison and myself part of the Borg.

His inclusion of me in his holodeck adventure, while irrelevant and
frivolous, I understand to be his attempt to include me in life on the
ship.  As I become more aware of the complex interactions between
crewmembers on this ship, I am inclined not too find these efforts
quite so irrelevant.  Lieutenant Paris' relationship with Lieutenant
Torres is an example.  The companionship and support they provide each
other is not irrelevant to productivity and collective integration.

The person who provides the most confusing contemplation for me is the
Captain. After much research I have decided that she fills a maternal
role in my life. While at times a friend, she is also a disciplinarian
and has been proven to follow a most illogical course of action at
times.  I do not find her casual disregard of some rules and
conversely her stringent enforcement of others to be a logical course
of action.

Most puzzling to me lately are her actions in certain areas.  While I
have made no overt observations, my enhanced perceptions of body
temperature and reactions, combined with much circumstantial evidence
to produce a troubling conclusion.

I have heard her speak of the positive effects of Lieutenant Paris and
Torres' relationship on twenty five separate occasions, however even
those words can be interpreted as an effort to, as Tuvok put it,
"..see that humans often convince themselves they are right by
repeating the same flawed actions or theories until they believe them
to be true."  I have noticed the Captain has a special fondness for
Lieutenant Paris.  In the beginning, I believed this special feeling
came from his position as her former protege.  However, I have revised
my theory with further observation.

Her reactions are similar to those I have witnessed in Ensign Kim when
I move close to him while working in small, enclosed areas.  I have
observed identical reactions, with the exception of certain anatomical
differences, in the Captain when she is in similar situations with
Lieutenant Paris.  I have been unable to determine if the Lieutenant
exhibits the same reactions due to his superior ability to hide his
emotions.  I have an 'instinctive feeling' that he feels more than
respect for her, but no proof to verify this illogical conclusion.
This has promoted my examination of relations among the Voyager crew.

Despite the overwhelming evidence, I was willing to believe I was in
error due to my limited experience with these matters.  As my
encounters with Ensign Kim have helped me to understand, awareness of
the facts from the database are not the only tools needed for
comprehension.  However, my observations earlier today on the bridge
have convinced me that this line of reasoning is not as irrelevant as
I first thought.

It was only a simple gesture that I had seen enacted many times on
previous visits to the bridge.  However, this time it was accompanied
by a returning smile from the recipient.  Prior to this occasion, I
had never observed Lieutenant Paris reciprocate the Captain's
flirting.  This time, when she placed her hand on his shoulder, he
returned what I have named his flirting smile. In the time I have
spent with and observed the Lieutenant, I have catalogued a total of
twenty-one different smiles.  Prior to this occasion, I have only
observed this smile when he and Lieutenant Torres are engaged in
conversation prior to leaving the room for copulation, which I
understand to be the goal of enticement.

I would like to analyze this further. However, for efficient study I
shall attempt this review of my relations on Voyager by consulting
another, more knowledgeable person. So far, this review has yielded no
conclusive participant, since most of those I label as friends are
either non-emotional or involved. Only Ensign Kim remains.  However, I
have observed that he is unable to keep a confidence, something that
would be undesirable in this discussion.  Perhaps further
contemplation alone will provide a logical answer to this dilemma.

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The End