The BLTS Archive - Unforgettable Scenario
by Jennifer Presley (jlpresley@aol.com)

---

Disclaimer: The characters are Paramount's, and the plot is taken from
spoilers from the upcoming episode "Unforgettable." The lyrics are
taken shamelessly from "To Love You More", by David Foster and Junior
Miles.

---

Something is happening. I can see it when he looks at her. The desire,
the raging emotional connection that is binding them together. I've
lost him. I say that, though he was never really mine. I couldn't see
past my narrow view of the possible permutations of the relationship
between a Captain and her First Officer.

I can't believe he kept his hopes alive for so long, when I took every
opportunity to smack him in the face with reality. I am the Captain. I
can't afford to lose my objectivity towards the crew. The rest of the
crew would view a personal relationship between the two most senior
officers as dangerous.

I was wrong.

He did love me, but I'm just his Captain now, maybe a friend, but no
more. The closeness we shared once upon a time is gone, and I'm left
with an aching emptiness where my heart used to be. We don't exist
anymore. There is Chakotay, and there is me. And now there is Chakotay
and Kellin, and me. Once again I am alone. But this is an isolation
entirely of my making.

Kellin. I don't know where she came from, or why she is so desperately
seeking sanctuary with us. All I know is the moment she materialized
on the transporter pad I lost him. I heard his gasp and I saw the
immediate attraction between them, a spark that has since grown into
an inferno.

She stepped down from the pad and walked over to him. He took her hand
in his, staring at her with his soulful brown eyes. Their world
narrowed until it just contained the two of them, he even forgot I was
standing less than 3 feet away from him. The transporter operator was
staring at them in shock, and I saw the look of pity she threw at me.

I don't want to be pitied. But in the three days since Kellin
disrupted our existence, I have seen this look on many of my crew.
I've heard the hushed whispers when I walk into a room, and noticed
how they are tiptoeing around me, doing anything they can to show
their Captain their support. I appreciate it, because I know they are
doing it to show they care, but I just wish they would stop.

I want to be left alone.

---

I heard them last night. These walls that are supposedly state of the
art in soundproofing, are not. The sounds of their passion trickled
through, until I was forced to put my pillow over my head in a feeble
attempt to block it out. I suppose I should be happy for him, after
all I wasn't able to give him what he wanted, what he needed.

I just can't help but think there is something wrong about her sudden
appearance, and their instant attraction. Deep down, I know that
things are not as they seem, and that he is going to be hurt, once
again. I just can't shake the feeling of overwhelming dread, which is
only heightened by the fact that I feel like someone is watching us.

The walls have eyes. Where did I hear that saying first? It seems so
appropriate, I feel like there is someone watching over everything
that is done or said on this ship. It's odd, but I don't remember
feeling this way before Kellin came onto the ship, and escaped from
the ships chasing her.

Her explanation is lacking, that she and Chakotay fell in love a few
months ago, and that her people have a technology that erased all our
memories and the ship's logs and sensor records. I don't doubt that
there are other technologically advanced civilizations besides ours,
but it's not possible that no one remembers any of it, especially
Tuvok.

A small part of me wonders, though, what if she's right? What if she
is telling the truth, and it's only a matter of time before her people
catch up with us and they can erase our memories? What will happen to
Chakotay? Will he remember her somehow? Maybe it would be better if he
didn't remember her, maybe I would get another chance to show him how
much I love him.

Another chance.....is it too much to ask for?

There is someone watching us, I feel it in my bones. But who? And why?

---

I went to Sandrine's tonight for the first time since Kellin entered
our lives. I was hoping that she and Chakotay wouldn't come, that they
would be too busy to come to the party Tom was throwing for Harry's
birthday. My hopes were in vain.

I was playing pool with Tom, and beating him soundly when a hush fell
over the assorted crewmembers present. My back was to the door, but I
saw the stricken look on B'Elanna's face, and I knew who had walked
in.

Slowly, I straightened up, the knuckles of my right hand white as it
gripped the pool cue. My frantic eyes darted from side to side as I
tried to stifle the urge to turn around and look for myself. Suddenly,
I knew they were walking towards us. I could feel the tension in the
air and I started to turn to face my fate.

Tom glanced at me, then came around to my side. "You know, Captain,
I'm parched. How about we go get something to drink?" His hand gently
eased the pool cue from my grasp and laid it on the table.

I nodded, and took a deep breath as I turned. I was face to face with
my First Officer and his lover.

Chakotay was smiling at something Kellin said, then he sobered quickly
when I faced him.

"Good evening, Commander, Kellin." I prided myself on my poise, and
raised my chin a fraction.

"Evening, Captain." His eyes held mine, a flash of sadness present in
their liquid depths. My spine stiffened, and I started to move past
them.

"I hope you enjoy yourselves, you should try some of the appetizers
Neelix has provided for the party." I walked away, trying to remember
how to breathe. Tom, bless his heart, was right behind me, his hand
lightly touching my elbow. When we arrived at the bar, I quickly
ordered a scotch from Sandrine. Unbidden, she made it a double. Even a
hologram could tell how upset I was.

Tom and I sat quietly, sipping our drinks, until B'Elanna joined us.
The band in the background had started to play again, and couples were
beginning to fill the dance floor. Chakotay and Kellin were one of
them, swaying gently to the soft strains of the music.

I watched them, trying to hide my roiling emotions behind my best
Captain's mask, while doing my best to not appear as if I was staring
at them. I had blocked out Tom and B'Elanna's conversation, and
eventually they left me alone, brooding into my drink. I should have
left then, but I was determined to not let them see how much I was
suffering. Suddenly my attention was riveted by a phrase of the song
that was playing.

//"And remember when
There was no one that you wanted more"//

The haunting vocals pierced to my soul, and silent tears coursed down
my cheeks as I listened.

//"She won't love you like I will...
I'll be waiting for you
Here inside my heart
I'm the one who wants to love you more"//

Suddenly, I found Chakotay was staring at me over her shoulder, his
eyes finding the evidence of my misery. I stood when he started
towards me, and fled out the door, ignoring the shocked crewmembers
who saw my flight.

I ran through the corridors, thanking the gods who had cleared the way
so I didn't have to face any more of my crew. It was bad enough that
some had seen the way I ran out of Sandrine's, but the thought of
staying to face Chakotay was enough to overcome my humiliation. Once I
reached the privacy of my quarters, I locked the doors and ordered the
computer to intercept all hails, except for emergency overrides, and
only those with Tuvok's authorization.

Shaking, I curled into a ball on the end of my couch. A short time
later, I heard Chakotay's voice pleading with me to open my door, but
I ignored him. I knew he would go away eventually, and return to
Kellin's arms. After 15 minutes, quiet fell once again on my quarters
and I dropped into an exhausted sleep, dreaming of a handsome man with
a tattoo that loved me, and whom I was free to love in return.

---

I didn't know how I was going to face everyone this morning. I took a
hot shower, and then bound my short hair back into a facsimile of the
bun I used to wear. It was symbolic, for I knew how much Chakotay used
to like it when I wore my hair down. But what did it matter now?

After stalling for as long as I dared, I made my way out of my
quarters and to the bridge. Alpha shift was just arriving, and luckily
I had beat Chakotay to duty. When he arrived, I was going over the
last reports from gamma shift and I could ignore him as he walked to
his seat.

Out of the corner of my eye, I can see him staring at me, trying to
work up the nerve to ask if he could talk to me in my ready room. I
know him, and I know what he's thinking. But I am determined to not
have to face him.

Turning to him, I hand him the PADD I had been reading and stand,
tugging at my uniform. "You have the bridge, Commander. I will be in
Engineering if something comes up." I can't look him in the eyes,
instead I focus on his hair.

He hesitates for an instant before acknowledging my order, then I
leave the bridge, wrapping the shredded remains of my pride around
myself like a cloak, blocking out the sympathetic glances from the
other crewmembers present. I was successful in avoiding him this time,
but I know my luck won't last.

---

"Captain?" B'Elanna's voice broke into my concentration, and I swore
as I dropped the laser welder I had been using on the latch to the
Jefferies tube. I had taken it upon myself to deal with the menial
problems that the Engineering staff never had enough time to deal
with, including the sticking latches. Luckily they had never been of
enough importance to justify the manpower, until now.

"Yes, Lieutenant?" I growled, seeking to let her know how displeased I
was at being disturbed.

She handed me the welder, and the look on her face told me she knew
why I was overreacting, and was choosing to ignore it. "I was just
wondering if you wanted to talk. I was worried about you, after you
ran...." Her voice trailed off, and she flushed slightly.

"After I ran out of Sandrine's, you mean." I felt bad, I knew she was
only trying to help. "I'm fine, B'Elanna. Really, don't worry about
me."

A brief snort of derision, as close to insubordination as she knew she
could get away with. "I don't believe you. I saw how Chakotay ran out
after you." She glanced to the side before continuing, lowering her
voice. "And I saw the anger on Kellin's face when he did."

"Please, B'Elanna. I don't want to talk about it." I tried to hide the
perverse pleasure I got out of knowing how Kellin had reacted.

"But, Kathryn..." B'Elanna subsided when I glared at her. "All right,
but I want you to know that I'm here if you want to talk." She crawled
away from me, leaving me with my thoughts.

Inevitably, they turned to my First Officer. It was tearing me apart,
seeing him with the alien woman. Knowing that I had blown my chance at
happiness. I returned to my task, seeking the numbing effect of
mindless work.

"Intruder alert! Captain Janeway, please report to sickbay." Tuvok's
voice blared out my combadge suddenly, and I jumped.

"Janeway to Tuvok. What is going on?" I rushed out of the Jefferies
tube, and set out at a run for the nearest turbolift.

"An alien male was hiding on the ship, and attacked Commander Chakotay
and Kellin."

Chakotay! The blood drained from my face, and I reached for the wall
of the turbolift to steady myself. "Are they all right?"

"The Commander will be fine, but the alien has disappeared, along with
Kellin."

I reached sickbay and ran in, finding a disheveled Chakotay sitting on
a biobed, the EMH running a tissue regenerator over a gash on his
forehead. "Report, Commander."

His distressed gaze met mine. "They've taken her. Just like she said
they would."

She hadn't been lying. The realization struck me, like a blow to the
stomach. "What about the memory wipe she warned us about?" The
bleakness of his gaze answered my question. I turned to face Tuvok.
"What is going to happen?"

"I do not know, Captain. I could not get a good reading on the weapon
before they disappeared." The Vulcan glanced at a PADD he was holding.
"Sensors indicate a virus was delivered to the computer system, and is
in the process of destroying any files relating to Kellin as we speak,
including my security logs."

Chakotay had risen to his feet, and was making his way painfully to
the door. "We have to get her back."

The ache in my heart was growing as I recognized his fear. I was saved
from answering by Tuvok's negative reply.

"There is nothing we can do, Commander. The alien ship is gone, and we
are unable to track it."

"Tuvok, I want you to try and stop the virus before it reaches any
sensitive files." I turned to walk out the door. "Commander, why don't
you return to your quarters and lie down, and I will try to find a way
to trace Kellin's captors." I softened my voice, trying to be
supportive. "We'll get them, somehow."

Chakotay glared at me, a haunted look in his eyes. "Don't patronize
me, Captain. We won't do any such thing, because shortly we won't
remember any of this. Kellin warned us what her people would do if
they caught up with us, but you wouldn't listen." He made as if to
walk away, then he looked at me again. "But I found a way to remember
her."

I tried to speak, to ask him what he meant, but I couldn't find the
words as he stormed out of sickbay. He was right. I had ignored the
warnings, as lost as I was in my own jealousy. I had endangered my
crew, and all because I had refused to acknowledge what he meant to
me, until it was too late.

I started to follow him but was stopped by a wave of nausea. I fell to
the floor, and then my world went black.

---

"Captain Janeway. Can you hear me?" The voice of the EMH woke me, and
I found myself on a biobed in sickbay.

"What happened?" I forced the words out of a mouth that felt like a
gigantic cotton ball had taken up residence inside. The last thing I
remembered was....eating breakfast with Chakotay.

"I don't know. I found you lying just inside the door when I activated
myself this morning." He glanced at his tricorder. "According to my
readings, you fainted. Have you not been eating again?"

I shook my head. "No, I just ate." I climbed down off the biobed as
the doors opened, and Chakotay came in, clutching a sheaf of papers in
his hand.

"Captain, are you all right?" The worry in his gaze softened when he
saw me.

"I'm fine, Commander." I pointed to the papers as I rubbed my hand
softly over my head. That's odd. I don't remember putting my hair up
in a bun this morning. "What are those?"

He glanced at them in confusion. "I'm not sure. I found them in my
quarters." Chakotay blushed slightly. "They seem to be some sort of
story I was writing...about falling in love with an alien."

I raised an eyebrow, and grinned at him slightly. "What type of alien?
I didn't know you had literary aspirations, Chakotay."

Embarrassed, he ducked his head. "I don't. I'm not sure where they
come from, I don't remember writing this." He hesitated, then tossed
them in the refuse slot. "Anyway, whatever it was, it was pretty
unbelievable."

I grinned and moved towards the door. "We had better get to the
bridge, or Tuvok will wonder what happened to us. We were only
supposed to be going for breakfast, and it's already 1100 hours."
Laughing, he followed me out the door.

Getting into the turbolift, I called for the bridge, then scratched
absentmindedly at my bun. He noted it, then frowned slightly.

"Kathryn, when did you put your hair up?"

Shaking my head, I replied. "I don't remember. I could swear I had
left it down this morning...for you." I colored as I realized I had
spoken my thoughts aloud. The smile on his face was worth it though.

"Computer, halt turbolift." Chakotay moved to stand next to me, then
his strong hands gently freed my hair from its restraints. He tenderly
fingered it, then pulled his hands back, caressing my face softly.
"There, that's better."

I stared at him mutely for a moment, then closed my eyes. I could feel
his warm breath on my face as his lips gently brushed mine.

"Kathryn?" The question in his voice roused me from the momentary
stupor his kiss had caused. I opened my eyes and found him staring at
me curiously. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that."

I raised my fingers to his lips. "Yes, you should have." The joy in
his expression filled me with happiness, and I felt as if a gigantic
weight had been lifted from my shoulders. "Will you have dinner with
me tonight?"

He nodded, before he kissed me again. "I would love to."

---

//"...Let me be the one to love you more..."//

---

The End