The BLTS Archive- Waiting
Geron #7: Acceptance
by Karen (CP4Karen@aol.com)

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Disclaimer: Paramount owns them. I imply no copyright
infringement.

c1998 Karen

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The trip to the mess hall has been a mistake.  I've developed
a blinding headache in the last half-hour.  I pinch the bridge
of my nose and pray for just a few minutes peace.

I don't even look up this time as someone slides quietly into
the chair opposite me.  I close my eyes and wait for another
opinion on whether I'm serious about Geron, or perhaps
whether I'm just going to end up dragging him down with
me, *or* just a cautious well-wisher.

I can count the last on one hand.

Neelix, of course.  He arrived with a reiteration of his belief
that everything would die down and a huge slice of strawberry
rhubarb pie...or a semi-reasonable facsimile thereof.

Seven was unexpected, but welcome.  With a terse, "May I sit?"
she eased into a surprisingly sensitive dissertation on the
behaviors that she had observed between us, and why they
bode well for the relationship.  I gave her a bite of my pie in
thanks, and smiled at the brief wrinkling of that elegant nose.

The last visitor sent me scrambling for my coffee as a mouthful
of pie crust threatened any chance for future breathing.  I
gestured to the chair, coughing and blinking back tears.

"Sorry."  The dimples said otherwise.  I suddenly had a flash of
another pair offset by a cute ridged nose.

"Liar.  You enjoyed the hell out of that."

He returned my grin.  "It was more relief than amusement.
I wasn't sure whether you would punch me or just walk away."
He sighed.  "I said some rather harsh things to you yesterday."

I sobered drastically as my stomach took another dip.  I
silently damned Neelix and his pie as it attempted to escape,
and then rubbed my left temple.

"Tom?  Are you OK?"

He actually looked concerned.  Of course, he could afford to.
As counselor and first officer, everyone would expect it, even
for piece-of-shit, Tom Paris.

"Tom?"

"Yeah.  Yeah, I'm fine.  Forgive me if I'm wondering which
of my sins you'll trot out this time," I muttered.

Chakotay frowned and then suddenly seemed to notice the
silence around us.  He tensed a bit and then stood, eyes
locked on mine as if unaware of our audience.

"I've got to get back to the Bridge, but I needed to apologize.
I'm beginning to see that you and Geron may be good for
each other.  So, if either of you need to talk to someone, I'm
available."  He clasped my shoulder briefly and then left.

I had been touched by Chakotay's words, in fact, all of their
words.  But, that was three out of the twelve crew members
who had felt they couldn't live without expressing their
opinion.  I'm thinking of asking for permission to just
beam wherever I need to go, but that might give Ops too
much of an opportunity.

//Yes, Captain, I can see that small cloud floating next to
the ship...Yes, Ma'am, I'm aware that used to be Lt. Paris...
No, Ma'am, I have no idea how the coordinates and dispersal
pattern changed...Yes, Captain--//

"Tom, are you in a coma or what?"

I quickly open my eyes to find that my latest detractor is
instead my lover.  I start to answer when I belatedly realize
that my headache has eased a bit.  Unfortunately, as if it
had just been waiting to get my attention, it comes back
with a vengeance, bringing my arms and legs along for
the ride.

"Chesei, are your eyes bothering you?"

Actually, it's everything.  My stomach which has been
threatening to rebel, makes a serious effort to crawl out
of my mouth.  I swallow quickly, and stand on shaky legs.

"Ger--,"  I start, and then find myself on my hands and
knees.

"--Tom!" crosses my exclamation, and I hear someone
sounding vaguely like Joe Carey request emergency
medical beam-out.

I suddenly feel cold, and as gray as my vision has become.
At least Tem's arms are warm and I welcome his touch.
His arms and his lips on my forehead are the last things
I sense as my world darkens and goes silent.

---

I grin as I exit the lift and head for the mess hall doors.
I had been called in to finish an experiment.  However,
it went quickly, and I hope that my surprise visit for lunch
will help to cheer my love.

He was a bit quiet this morning...well, as quiet as one
can be with someone driving them to distraction.

//OhGodohGodohGodohGod--//

I particularly liked that response.

I look around the hall and see Tom in the far corner.
His eyes are focused on the table, and from the way he's
massaging his forehead, I'd say lunch has been a trial.
I fill my tray and nod at Neelix, knowing that he's worried
about Tom, also.  As I slide into my seat, I notice Tom's
eyes are now closed and he's hunched as if waiting for a
blow.

Has he already heard from the Captain?

No. If he'd had bad news Tom would have asked me to
meet him in his cabin.  It's something else then, and I
look around the room trying to get some kind of hint as
to how to approach this.  After roughly two minutes of
silence, I am exasperated.

"Tom, are you in a coma or what?"

He looks up in surprise, and I realize that he had no idea
that it was me.  I watch as he grimaces and my worry
grows.

"Chesei, are your eyes bothering you?"

Prophets, it's more than his eyes.  He looks at me as if to
speak and then swallows.  I stand as he does and reach out
shaking hands towards my love.  I hear Carey call for a
beam-out as all hell breaks loose.

Tom's calling me, I'm calling him, and together we crash
to the floor.  He's shaking, pale and gasping, and my fear
shoots through the roof as Tom's eyes roll back and he
goes limp in my arms.

He's so cold...

---

The trip from the Bridge to Sickbay seems to take forever.
Something is going on with the man at my side...Chakotay
has been a mess ever since the news of Tom and Geron came
to our attention.

I am praying that there is nothing seriously wrong with
Tom, although it sounds bad.  I spent most of last night
thinking of their plight, and have decided that they
deserve just as much of a chance together as any other
couple.

Now, if they just have the time...

---

The End