The BLTS Archive - The Measure of A Man:
# 4: Adaptation
by Isla (Islaofhope@aol.com)

---

Disclaimer: Star Trek and its characters all belong to Paramount. This
is fan fiction. I won't make any money from it.

I want to dedicate this to Francesca because I was inspired by her
"Ways of a Woman" to write this sequel.  She hasn't seen this yet,
however, because deja is down and I'm too darned impatient to wait for
her response before I post!

It's really just a little vignette.  I'm brimming with more ideas
about this situation, but I felt the need to post this one.  Thanks to
Jat Sapphire not only for a really quick beta, but the conversations
with her that really got me thinking about this.  And, again, I'm
grateful to her for watching "Turnabout Intruder," and convincing me
to actually watch the episode after so many years of avoiding it.  I
thought that I hated it, but it featured wonderful performances by
Leonard, Bill, and Sandra Smith to make the situation convincing.

Both positive and negative feedback is welcome.

---

"At least something good has come out of this, Spock," Jim said as the
door to the captain's quarters slid closed behind them at the end of
the stressful day of Jim's command competency hearing.  She raised a
slender hand and brushed her fingertips across Spock's lips.
"Starfleet has its first female starship captain."

Spock captured that hand and kissed the delicate wrist.  "That is not
strictly true."

Jim's eyes had drifted shut, as though she desired the tactile
sensation without the distraction of visual information.  But her eyes
flew open as she jerked her hand away, and planted her clenched fists
on his hips.  "What is that supposed to mean?  Lieutenant Lindsey made
some comment like that, too."  Her blue eyes lifted to Spock's brown
ones. "I'm sure, Science Officer, that you've reviewed the results of
McCoy's testing."

"I have."  Spock clasped his hands loosely behind his back and swept
his eyes over her undeniably curvaceous body.

At the beginning of the first shift after Spock reinstated her as
captain, Jim had walked onto the bridge in a miniskirted uniform, and
Spock had been unable to control the elevation of his eyebrow.  Jim
had responded to that eyebrow lift by tugging down the skirt of the
uniform.  During the rest of the shift, she continued to occasionally
tug at either the neck or hemline.  The next day, she appeared in dark
trousers and a gold tunic, which more closely resembled what the
Enterprise's captain had always worn, albeit cut to accommodate a
feminine form.  Soon after, other female members of the crew also
adopted a trousered uniform.

A corner of her mouth quirking up, Jim unclenched her fists, took a
step closer, and rested her palms on Spock's chest.  "And your
own...personal experience...?  Wouldn't you say *that* corroborated
McCoy's results?"

Spock's eyebrow lifted.  Although his hands remained behind his back,
he leaned into that touch slightly.  "My own experience, Jim?" 
Spock's lips turned up slightly. "One would think that you, yourself,
had arranged for the exchange of your body with Dr. Lester's.  To
allow us to practice a new set of sexual techniques."

Jim's eyes sparkled.  "No, I would never have *chosen* to give up my
cock."  She stepped closer.  "At least I still have your cock."

"You do indeed."  Unclasping his hands, Spock slid his arms around Jim
and pulled the compact body against him.  He bent his head to capture
Jim's mouth in a slow, sweet kiss.  The lips were slightly fuller, the
mouth was not as wide, and the taste was slightly different than what
he had learned to enjoy in eighteen months of shared kisses with his
captain.  But his knees weakened and his groin tightened in response
to a familiar spark when their lips met.

The first night that Jim appeared in his quarters after becoming
trapped in Janice Lester's body, Spock had been reluctant to touch
that which was not the body of his beloved.  A combination of Jim's
need for comfort and - admittedly - Jim's skill at inspiring arousal
had convinced Spock to make love to him.  To her.  The next morning,
Spock had initially recoiled when he woke with an unfamiliar body
draped over his.  In the shock of waking *in* that body, Jim had first
been angry with Spock for not desiring Dr. Lester's body and next
accused him of preferring Dr. Lester's body to Jim's own.

During the subsequent fourteen days, Spock occasionally thought about
the feel of Jim's erection against his own.  Jim's passion for life --
and for Spock -- lit these blue eyes and made this face beautiful. But
sometimes, as he listened to Jim's slightly altered breathing as she
slept, he remembered Jim's warm smile, the strength of his masculine
body, and his distinctive scent.  Spock longed for the slight tang of
Jim's human male musk.

"I love you, Spock."  Jim's new voice was too soft and too melodic,
but Spock's heartbeat accelerated slightly at these words.

Spock combed his fingers through her almost shoulder length hair and
pressed a kiss into her temple.  "Jim."  His other hand slid down her
back and cupped the right buttock that was slightly fuller than Jim's
own familiar one.  "T'hy'la, you wished additional experiences?"

Jim nodded, a slight movement against Spock's collar bone, but instead
of increasing the level of erotic tension, she said, "I think I would
have gone insane if I didn't have you.  Your loyalty, mostly.  No one
would have believed that I was here in this body if you didn't
believe."  She put a hand up to brush against Spock's temple.  "If it
weren't for our mental link, I don't know if *I* would've believed
me."

"Would you prefer a mental joining now rather than a physical one?"
Spock's heartbeat accelerated again.  When they were in each other's
minds, Spock forgot to wish for more.  The life force of his bondmate
still glowed in this body as well as in the part of Spock's mind where
their bond lived.

"I want both."  A soft laugh.  "Remember how worried Bones was that I
would hate this body?  Being trapped here?"

"A logical concern."

Jim leaned back in the circle of Spock's arms.  "How can I hate it?
You give me so much pleasure when you touch me."  Jim leaned forward
again to brush his lips against Spock's, sending a lance of desire
through him.

"Perhaps it would be well to apply additional positive stimulus."
Spock's lips moved lower to kiss Jim's throat.

---

Later, Jim interrupted the series of kisses she was placing along
Spock's collarbone to raise herself on one elbow.  "Spock, tell me
what you meant about me not being Starfleet's first female starship
captain."

Spock's eyes had been closed in post-coital relaxation.  Reluctantly,
he opened his eyes to study Jim's flushed face.  "It would be
illogical to argue that you do not inhabit a female body."  He smiled
faintly and reached out to stroke back the hair from Jim's forehead. 
"Are you so very enamored of being 'the first' female captain?  Is it
not enough that you were the youngest?"

Jim turned away to sit up, hug her knees to her chest, and stare at
the opposite bulkhead.  "That's not it, Spock."  She shook her head.
"I felt as though Lindsey was angry when the board announced its
decision to reinstate me."

Spock sat up, too, and silently began to massage the tight muscles in
Jim's back.

"I thought that she'd be happy that they hadn't removed me as captain
of the Enterprise.  When I first met with her before the hearing, she
reminded me that there were no female starship captains.  She said
that Starfleet must not consider women good enough for the job.  That
the job required a penis.  You know, the same kind of angry diatribe
that Janice used to..."  She shook her head.  "Well, I passed all
those psychological tests with flying colors.  I'm still the same
person I was before.  I command this ship with my mind, not with my
muscles or my cock."

Spock swallowed, thinking of how thoroughly Jim had "commanded" his
first officer with those muscles and that "cock."  He pushed the
thought aside. They had proven that they loved because of the affinity
of their minds, not because of Jim's body parts.  He had felt no
desire when he had gazed at Jim's body with Dr. Lester coldly staring
out those formerly brilliant eyes.  Still, Spock wondered how many
additional nights he would lie awake thinking of Jim's masculine body.

He rubbed the knots of tension from her neck.  "What did she say after
the hearing?  What troubled you?"

"She said that they were afraid to turn me down, Spock."  She let out
a long sigh.  "It would look like they did it only because of a bias
against women.  She said that by re-confirming my appointment as
captain of the Enterprise, they proved just how biased they are
against women.  This would just slow them down from promoting a real
woman."

His hands stilled on her shoulders.  "I doubt that you are insulted
that she does not consider you a 'real' woman."

Jim smiled at that.  She reached behind for Spock's left hand and
kissed his fingertips.  "No, I'm not sure exactly what I am, but I
guess it doesn't bother me that..."  She paused for a moment, gripping
his hand.  "You know, you're right.  It's ludicrous that I should want
to be the first female starship captain.  When I get my own body back-
"

"Jim."  He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her back against
him, unable to think of any words of comfort.

She covered his hands with her own.  "I know.  It's illogical to hope
for it when we have no idea how to accomplish it."  She shook her
head.  "But you can't deny that you think about it, too."

"Oh, Jim."  How could he have doubted that Jim knew his mind?  There
was so little that he could hide from him.  From her.

"It's OK, Spock.  This is tough on both of us."  Jim shrugged her
shoulders.  "But you agree with her, don't you?  Lindsey, I mean.  And
Janice, too, I guess.  That Starfleet is a 'boy's only' club?"

Spock weighed truth against wounding Jim further and decided that it
was useless and insulting to withhold the truth.  "You know as well as
I the make-up of the command crews of the twelve starships in the
fleet."

"They're all men," she said, forgetting that she was not.  "But it's
extraordinarily difficult to be a starship captain.  You know that."

"You *are* extraordinary, Jim."  And I love you with all of my heart.
But he did not say that out loud.  He never did.  "You are the finest
starship captain in the fleet, but it is your intellect and your
spirit, not your body parts that - "

"They're all Terran, too.  Except for you, of course...all of the
captains and first officers are Terran males."  Jim let out a breath.
"And I would like to tell you that it's because the Academy is on
Earth...but...it doesn't make sense."  She twisted out of the circle
of his arms, bounced off the bed, and began to pace the room.  She
stopped to study him, crossing her arms across her breasts.  "You
should be a starship captain."

Although the room was not particularly cold, Spock hid a shiver, drew
the covers up around himself, and recalled Admiral Nogura's anger when
he had spoken privately to Spock about the situation.  "What were you
thinking, Commander?  How could you have allowed her to take command?"
Spock had relived Janice Lester of command after she, inhabiting Jim's
body, had issued irrational orders and brought the senior officers to
near-mutiny.  In truth, Spock had taken temporary command until McCoy
had run sufficient psychological testing to be willing to certify
Jim's command fitness.

Nogura had also said, "I don't care if she is walking around with Jim
Kirk's memories.  Women don't have the temperament to command a
starship."

Spock had met Nogura's eyes calmly.  "James T. Kirk is the legally
appointed captain of the Enterprise."  Spock also said, "Admiral, I
doubt that you would wish to make public your statement regarding the
fitness of a woman to assume command."

Spock did not wish to repeat Nogura's statement even to Jim.  Instead
he said, "You know that I have never wished for command.  Captain
Pike's first officer, however, deserved such a command."

Jim plopped down on the edge of the bed.  "Instead, they gave the
Enterprise to some kid because he happened to be a male Terran and
he'd called attention to himself through a string of heroics.  Guess I
know now why you weren't too impressed when you first met me."  She
rubbed two fingers along her lower lip.

"That was not my meaning."  He stretched out a hand to Jim.  "Come
back to bed, my own."

Jim flopped into Spock's arms and buried her face against his
shoulder.  "Do you know that's the first time that you've called me
that since I ended up...like this?"  She tilted back her head so that
their eyes could meet.  "I guess I've never thought about it.  How can
it be possible that it's still so tough for women?  In the 23rd
Century?"  She hesitated.  "And non-Terrans, Spock.  I don't know why
I haven't noticed.  I always thought of myself as sensitive to
injustice."

"It will be more apparent to you now."  Spock rubbed his hands down
her back.

Was it for the best that Jim had retained command of the Enterprise?
He...she would soon find that much that she had taken for granted
would be impossible.  Jim could not push this body as hard as her
former body. Although her mind was as agile as ever, neither friends
nor enemies were likely to react to her the same way they did to James
T. Kirk in his masculine body.

How would she react the first time that she issued a challenge to an
enemy and that enemy either laughed in her face or easily defeated her
in battle?  How much could Spock protect her both physically and
mentally from harm?  How quickly would she resent that protection?

Spock frowned, realizing that he was guilty of the same prejudice as
Nogura when he assumed that Jim could not perform her duties in this
body.

Even a male starship captain should not be engaged in the hand-to-hand
combat that Jim Kirk seemed to invite.  How many times had Spock
reminded Jim that it was Security's job to protect the captain?  As
part of her adaptation to her changed body, Jim had already begun
regular workouts with Lieutenant Uhura, explaining that she needed to
know how differently a woman's body responded to that type of stress.
And there was no doubt that the communications officer was effective
in the instances that hand-to-hand combat was necessary.

Spock also recalled the strength of Jim's resolve standing in front of
the competency board and, later, during an interview with Nogura while
Spock stood quietly in his accustomed place a few centimeters behind
Jim's left  shoulder.  She still knew how to command respect with a
cool gaze.

Nonetheless, it would not be easy.  For either of them.

"Sounds like Lieutenant Uhura and I need to do some serious talking in
addition to our workouts.  I've been so intent thinking about the
physical part, Spock, that I haven't thought about what else is
important."  She rubbed the back of her hand against her tired eyes.
"This is one helluva vivid consciousness raising."

Her eyes sought Spock's again.  "I'm determined that something good is
going to come out of this."  She lifted Spock's hand to her lips and
kissed the knuckles.  "I may not -- technically  -- be the first
female starship captain, but I'm gonna be the best one that I can be.
If only to convince Fleet that it can be done."  She yawned and
nestled closer against Spock.  "I'm cold.  Let's turn up the
temperature in this cabin and get some sleep."

"That is a definite advantage to sharing a bed with a female."  Spock
reset the temperature control to a more comfortable level and then
returned to the bed to gather Jim in his arms.  "In spite of their
naturally higher percentage of body fat, Terran females are more
sensitive to cold than are Terran males."

Jim clouted him with a pillow before she laughed and said, "I guess
you're right about that, Spock.  But just how many Terran females have
you shared a bed with?"  She shifted against him with a soft sigh,
mumbled "I love you," and shortly after, her steady breathing told him
that she had fallen asleep without waiting for an answer.

---

The End