The BLTS Archive - Consolation
by ILuvKate ILuvKate

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Copyright © by ILuvKate, 1998

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B'Elanna Torres,on her way to repair a malfunctioning circuit, saw the
Captain's solitary figure leaning on the sill of the viewport on Deck
7 and stopped. This was a secluded and mostly deserted part of the
ship, frequented mainly by couples wanting privacy for romantic
escapades.

The Captain's slumped shoulders and weary stance bore mute evidence to
her state of mind. The whole ship had been steeped in somber silence
since the death of the Away Team. And nobody on board Voyager could be
feeling the pain of loss more keenly than Kathryn Janeway. Torres had
been at the Engineering station on the Bridge when the Captain had
learned that every Away Team member had been savagely slaughtered by
the marauding inhabitants who for some bizarre reason, as yet
unexplained, had not shown up on Voyager's sensors. Kathryn Janeway
rarely let her command persona slip on the Bridge, but it had not only
slipped, it had been shattered when she had learned of the Away Team's
deaths. Her face had gone chalk-white, and she had seemed to stop
breathing for at least five minutes. Then, training took over and she
had turned furiously to Tactical and Ops for an explanation as to why
sensors had indicated an uninhabited planet. Even after her officers
assured her that they were working perfectly, she had shaken her head,
disbelieving, demanding a re- check. Then she had left the Bridge for
Transporter Room 1 where the bodies were beamed back aboard.

The Captain's bowed shoulders bespoke a burden of unimagined pain.
And, Torres guessed shrewdly, knowing Janeway, unbearable guilt. She
stood thoughtfully, looking at the study in grief that was Kathryn
Janeway, wondering if the Captain would resent an intrusion.

Well, if she does, she can tell me to go away, Torres decided, heading
for the silent figure staring blindly out the viewport. She
deliberately made her steps sound on the deck and Janeway turned at
her approach. Torres was almost taken aback by the pools of misery
that were the Captain's eyes. Her features were pinched and drawn.

"Captain, I don't want to intrude," Torres began. Janeway didn't say
anything, but made a tired, helpless gesture.

"It's all right, B'Elanna," she said in a dead voice. She turned back
to the viewport. "Did Chakotay send you up here?" she asked.

"No, ma'am," Torres replied. "There's a malfunctioning circuit board
over there I came up to repair." Janeway turned quickly, her eyes
sharpening.

"Could that have caused a sensor malfunction?" she demanded.

"No, Captain," Torres said gently. "We've determined beyond all doubt
that sensors were working properly." She substituted "properly" for
"perfectly" at the last second. Janeway sighed, closing her eyes,
dropping her head.

"Captain," Torres began, "nobody and no *thing* is to blame for what
happened to the Away Team." Janeway winced visibly and turned her back
to her Chief Engineer. "Least of all you," she added bluntly. Janeway
didn't move. "Harry has discovered that the inhabitants of the planet
emit a natural electrical dampening field that blinds sensors," she
continued. Impulsively, she stepped forward and put a hand on the
Captain's shoulder. "Captain, you-are-not-to-blame," she said
urgently, enunciating each word firmly.

"B'Elanna," the Captain's voice was choked. "If you ever decide to go
for a command, you will understand." Torres dropped her hand and
stepped back.

"Perhaps," she said quietly, "but," she continued boldly, "I would
hope I have the wisdom to know when to blame myself for a disaster and
when to blame circumstances." She half-expected the Captain to whirl
around with fire in her eyes at that last, but aside from a sudden
movement, quickly stilled, Janeway did nothing. "Tell me, Captain,"
B'Elanna said, "just what else could you have done to avoid what
happened?" There was a silence. The Captain's hand had come up to
cover her eyes and Torres waited, determined to make her answer. At
length, Janeway drew a deep breath and turned to face the other woman
wordlessly. Then,

"You have a knack, Lieutenant," she said drily, "for jerking people to
attention in more ways than one." Torres smiled.

"I probably didn't say any more to you than Chakotay already has," she
observed keenly. Janeway grinned crookedly and nodded. Then she
straightened, tugging the jacket of her uniform down.

"Yes," she said. "And I suppose you're both right." She started past
Torres. "But it doesn't make it hurt any the less," she added.

"Of course not," Torres agreed, "but place the blame where it lies,
not on yourself." Janeway gave a wan smile.

"Aye, aye, Lieutenant," she said, sketching a mock salute. Torres
laughed and turned to go to the circuit board she'd come up to repair.
The Captain moved past her down the corridor. Torres watched her go.

A few evenings later, Torres was heading for her quarters, ready for a
shower and dinner after a long day in Engineering, when she was hailed
by the Captain.

"B'Elanna," Janeway said, "do you have any plans for dinner?"

"No, Captain," Torres replied.

"Would you like to join me for dinner in my quarters?" Janeway asked.
Torres sensed the Captain's need for companionship.

"I'd like that very much," she accepted. "Can I bring anything?"

"A bottle of your favorite wine, if you'd like" Janeway responded. "If
your day's been anything like mine, you could probably use it."

"It has and I could," Torres agreed. "What time?"

"Thirty minutes?" Janeway queried. "Wear something comfortable."

"I'll see you then," Torres said.

---

At 1845, Torres rang the Captain's chime, entering at her, "Come in."
Janeway was removing some dishes from the replicator and smiled in
welcome. "Do you have any special preferences?" she asked, placing
some steaming food on the table. Torres walked over to the table and
set the wine on it, picking up a corkscrew.

"Surprise me," she said, inserting the corkscrew in the bottle's cork
and twisting. When she'd removed the cork, she poured the wine into
two glasses as Janeway placed the last of the dinner on the table.
They drew up chairs and sat down. Janeway sampled the wine, nodding
approvingly.

"This is good," she remarked, picking up a plate and passing it to her
guest.

"I've been saving it for a special occasion," Torres said, drinking
from her own glass.

"Well, how nice, B'Elanna, thank you," the Captain said warmly. They
began to eat, discussing some minor Engineering matters desultorily.
When they'd finished, they cleared the table and carried glasses of
wine over to the couch to continue an animated discussion on uses for
syrillium as an alternative power source. Eventually, Torres glanced
at a chronometer.

"I guess I'd better hit the sack," she said reluctantly. "I have the
early shift. But this has been the most enjoyable evening, Kathryn."
In the course of the evening, the Captain had become Kathryn. B'Elanna
didn't find using the Captain's given name as difficult as she might
have imagined.

"It certainly has," Kathryn agreed.

"May I return the favor?" B'Elanna asked, "and invite you to dinner in
my quarters day after tomorrow?"

"Thank you," Kathryn replied. "Same time?"

"Same time," B'Elanna replied. "Good night, Kathryn."

"Good night, B'Elanna," Kathryn said. "Sleep well."

---

A couple of weeks later found the two heading for the gym, tennis
rackets in hand. Kathryn had invited B'Elanna to play a few sets. "Go
easy on me, Lieutenant," she said. "It's been a while." They played a
few vigorous sets, two of which Kathryn won, to her surprise. Beating
B'Elanna Torres in any kind of athletic endeavor was impressive.
B'Elanna had made her work for it, though, and she'd found long-lost
skills returning as she played. Pleasantly tired, they headed for the
showers. B'Elanna invited Kathryn to her quarters for a cold beer and
Kathryn accepted. They scheduled a handball game to be played three
days later and Kathryn departed for her quarters.

"Boy," Kathryn remarked feelingly as she sat in the dressing room
after a killer handball match in which she'd been soundly trounced by
her Chief Engineer, "You don't give any quarter, do you?" She
addressed this remark to B'Elanna who had just finished her shower.
Kathryn was massaging her shoulder. B'Elanna laughed.

"And you wouldn't expect any," she said. "What's the matter?"

"I think I pulled something lunging after that last shot," Kathryn
replied. B'Elanna came over to her and placed her hands on the
affected spot. She was totally unprepared for the wash of heat that
suddenly swept through her body as she did. She swallowed in
confusion. What the hell...? Kathryn didn't seem to notice anything,
and after a few seconds' hesitation, B'Elanna began to massage the
tight muscle. Kathryn grunted a couple of times as B'Elanna's strong
fingers dug into her, but said nothing. After kneading for a few
minutes, B'Elanna stepped back, dropping her hands. She struggled for
control, disconcerted by the sensations that were whirling within her.
Kathryn rolled the shoulder.

"That feels better, thanks," she said. B'Elanna murmured something and
turned to get dressed as Kathryn rose and headed for the shower.
Absently, B'Elanna pulled on her clothes. This was a hell of a note,
she thought. You must be completely off your rocker. Of all the crazy
things, to get turned on when touching Kathryn Janeway. She shook her
head impatiently and sat down to fasten her shoes. Kathryn came out of
the shower and began to dress. B'Elanna doggedly kept her eyes averted
as Kathryn pulled on her red warmup suit. "I enjoyed it, B'Elanna,"
Kathryn said as they picked up their bags and headed for the door. "I
think," she added wryly, flexing her shoulder.

---

B'Elanna found it difficult to concentrate over the next few days. The
ship had gone into orbit around an M-class planet, Nevro VII, and
everyone was busy preparing to take on supplies. B'Elanna would find
herself drifting off into thought when she was supposed to be running
simulations and chastised herself fiercely. At night, alone in her
quarters, she found sleep elusive, her thoughts on the woman on the
Bridge. They hadn't been able to get together for dinner or much else,
since Janeway was involved in negotiations with the planet's leaders,
and she and Chakotay were invited to dinner with them on the surface.
Just as well, B'Elanna reflected, because she was afraid that being
around Kathryn right now was going to reduce her to a tongue-tied
state, and Kathryn would think she was crazy.

When Voyager finished their dealings with the Nevrons and was back on
course to the Alpha Quadrant, Kathryn invited B'Elanna to dinner.
Since there was no way to decline, without seeming a complete and
total idiot, B'Elanna gritted her teeth and appeared at Kathryn's
quarters. They talked about the Nevrons and the supplies they'd
acquired as they ate, although if threatened with death, B'Elanna
couldn't have said what she put in her mouth. It was all she could do
to concentrate on making sensible replies to Kathryn's remarks. "When
are we going to another handball match?" Kathryn asked when they'd
finished and were sitting on the couch.

"Uh, oh, any time," B'Elanna responded, hoping she didn't sound like a
fool. She could feel her face getting warm. Stop it, you damn fool,
she berated herself. If Kathryn noticed anything wrong, she chose not
to comment on it.

The hoverball game was a farce from the start because B'Elanna
couldn't keep her mind on it. But her near undoing came when,
scrambling for the ball, they tripped over each other and landed in a
heap. B'Elanna found herself sprawled on top of Kathryn who was flat
on her back, their faces only inches apart. Hastily, B'Elanna
scrambled to her feet, her face flaming, and helped Kathryn up.
Another five seconds with feeling her breasts pressed into Kathryn's
and the jig would've been up.

"Sorry about that," she mumbled, and trotted away to serve the ball
again. The game resumed, and with a superhuman effort, B'Elanna
focused her concentration on trying to win the game. She proved to be
unsuccessful and Kathryn was grinning broadly as they left the court
and headed for the dressing room. They retired to B'Elanna's quarters
for a cold beer. Kathryn lounged against the counter, sipping her icy
brew. She wondered idly why B'Elanna seemed so flustered, and
attributed it to her losing the handball match. She stared into the
foam in her glass, remembering a couple of really good serves and
returns she'd made. She was enjoying this physical activity lately.
She felt better, slept more soundly. She had B'Elanna to thank, she
realized. B'Elanna had jerked her up out of that pit of desolation the
day of the Away Team tragedy and made her realize that she had not
been at fault for it. She glanced at B'Elanna, intending to make a
remark on these thoughts and was oddly caught at the sight of her trim
athletic form as she stood a meter or so away, drinking her own beer.
She'd taken off her warm up jacket and still wore her game jersey, a
sleeveless v-necked top of a silvery blue fabric. It hugged her slim
torso and Kathryn noted the ripple of muscles across her back as she
turned to punch another request into the replicator. A peculiar surge
of warmth through her at the sight made Kathryn frown thoughtfully.
Step back, KJ, she thought to herself. This is your Chief Engineer on
the ship of which you are Captain. Just rein it in. She drained her
beer.

"Want another one?" B'Elanna asked, interrupting her reverie. Mentally
shaking herself, Kathryn nodded.

"I think so," she said. "That was a hard game." B'Elanna turned to
punch the request into the replicator and Kathryn saw that she was
massaging her elbow. "What's the matter with your elbow?" she asked
casually, gesturing with the beer mug. B'Elanna turned and took the
beer out of the replicator and handed it to her.

"I landed on it before I splattered all over you," she said.

"Think you'd better let Doc look at it?" Kathryn asked. B'Elanna shook
her head.

"No," she said. "I just bumped it hard." Kathryn set her beer mug down
and moved over to take B'Elanna's arm in one hand as she gently probed
the elbow with the other. Something akin to a shock rippled along her
nerves as she touched B'Elanna's skin and their gazes locked at the
same moment. Kathryn swore to herself as she saw B'Elanna flush
darkly. B'Elanna stopped herself just in time from jerking her arm out
of the Captain's grasp, feeling the same crackle of energy at the same
time Kathryn did. She swallowed convulsively and for a long, long
minute, they stared at each other.

"I--," Kathryn started to speak, and then stopped. She was still
holding B'Elanna's elbow and now she tugged gently, gesturing at the
couch. "Let's sit down, B'Elanna," she said gently. "I think we have
to talk." B'Elanna's shoulders sagged. She'd tried so damned hard to
keep her feelings and expressions under control, and failed. She
followed Kathryn to the couch and sat down. Kathryn sat down next to
her and took one of her tightly clenched fists in her hand, gently
smoothing it out, making her relax.

"Talk to me, B'Elanna," she said quietly. B'Elanna dropped her head,
wishing she was anywhere but here.

"God!" she said miserably. She drew a ragged, hitching breath.

"You felt it, too, didn't you?" Kathryn asked gently. B'Elanna looked
up, startled.

"Y-you---?" she faltered. Kathryn nodded soberly.

"Yes," she said. "Is this why you've been so flustered lately?"
B'Elanna grimaced.

"Was it that obvious?" she muttered. Kathryn lifted a hand and brushed
an errant tendril of hair off B'Elanna's flushed cheek and B'Elanna
shuddered. "Kathryn," she said raggedly. "If you do that again, I'm
not going to be able to control myself." For answer, Kathryn turned
her face to hers and leaned over to kiss her--gently, but thoroughly.

"Why should you have to?" Kathryn whispered softly. "I want you, too,
B'Elanna. As much as I think you want me." They kissed again,
exploring, tasting each other. Kathryn decided that tasting the beer
on B'Elanna was a definite improvement. They moved closer, embracing,
and Kathryn's hands roved over that firm, muscular back she'd been
admiring only minutes earlier. B'Elanna fumbled for the zipper on
Kathryn's warmup top and pulled it down, sliding her hand inside to
cup a warm, full breast. Kathryn groaned against B'Elanna's mouth as
B'Elanna fondled her. Her own hands sought the waist of B'Elanna's
warmup bottom and pulled the tail of the jersey out of it, moving her
hands under the jersey and sliding her palms across B'Elanna's bare
flanks, moving up toward B'Elanna's lush breasts. She reached around
her to unfasten her bra and pushed under the bra to take B'Elanna's
breasts in her hands. B'Elanna gasped and jerked at Kathryn's touch.
Suddenly Kathryn pulled away and stood up. B'Elanna stared up at her
with a glazed expression.

"Let's go into the bedroom," Kathryn said, holding out her hand.
B'Elanna stood up shakily, taking her hand. They walked to the
bedroom, hand in hand, shoulders touching. In the bedroom they
undressed each other languidly, touching and stroking, admiring each
other. When Kathryn had drawn off B'Elanna's panties, she made her lie
down on the bed and stood, still clad in her panties and drank in the
sight of that beautiful body with its coiled steel strength, naked to
her gaze. B'Elanna lay quietly across the bed and basked in Kathryn's
scrutiny, enjoying the smoldering fire in those electric blue eyes.
Her turn would come soon enough to devour Kathryn in turn--in more
ways than one.

"You are more beautiful than I even imagined you could be," Kathryn
whispered and moved to the bed, bracing herself on one knee beside
B'Elanna. She rubbed her thumb across B'Elanna's full lips and
B'Elanna's breathing quickened. Kathryn trailed her fingers down the
side of her throat and then circled her breast. The nipple hardened
under her touch and Kathryn tugged on it gently, causing B'Elanna to
whimper. She moved to the other nipple, teasing it, a little rough,
and B'Elanna arched her back, moaning.

"God!" she said hoarsely. "Take me in your mouth! Please!" Her hands
reached for Kathryn, but Kathryn discouraged her gently.

"Let me make love to you, sweet," she said softly, "and then you can
have your way with me." She bent and kissed the younger woman gently,
fondling her, and slid off the bed onto her knees, pulling B'Elanna
forward a bit. Then she took aching nipples in her mouth until
B'Elanna writhed on the bed, crying out. When she felt Kathryn's
fingers slide into her a minute later, she bucked spasmodically under
the double onslaught of Kathryn's mouth on her breasts and fingers in
her sex, mauling the swollen clit gently. She came explosively in a
hot roiling surge of pleasure.

B'Elanna sat up, and hooking her hands under Kathryn's armpits, lifted
her as easily as she would have a child, onto the bed with her,
holding her for a minute or two suspended above her. Then, still
holding her, she lowered her an infinitesimal couple of inches and
kissed her hungrily. Kathryn was aroused by this display of strength,
and felt herself getting wet. B'Elanna let her down so that Kathryn
lay on top of her and wrapped her arms around her kissing her some
more. Then suddenly she flipped them both over she that she was now on
top and she bent, nipping Kathryn's neck with a gentle bite. She
licked the pinkened skin, running her tongue across her collarbone to
the tip of Kathryn's shoulder. Kathryn made a guttural noise deep in
her throat that turned into a moan as B'Elanna moved down to lave her
breasts, moving from one to the other. She alternated between sucking
the taut nipples and licking circles around the breasts, driving
Kathryn to the edge of madness. She moved up to devour Kathryn's
mouth, and then down again to her breasts. Finally, she made her way,
in a torturously sweet trail of hot, wet kisses, down Kathryn's chest,
across her stomach and into her sex, where she delved hungrily with
her lips and tongue into the warm sweetness of Kathryn Janeway.
Kathryn climaxed in a jerking spasm of pleasure, lying spent, with
B'Elanna's cheek resting on her belly.

Eventually, they moved up to lie side by side in quiet contentment,
arms clasped loosely about each other, B'Elanna's head on Kathryn's
shoulder, Kathryn's cheek against B'Elanna's dark head.

---

Thus began a season of delight for them both. They met in one or the
other's quarters at the end of their duty shifts where they would
share a pleasant meal there before engaging in an evening of quietly
contented conversation prior to retiring to the bedroom to continue
their delighted exploration of each other. They didn't sneak around to
see each other, but neither did they trumpet their newfound
relationship. They'd talked seriously about the implications of
Kathryn's having a relationship with a member of her crew and its
impact on the command structure. The fact that B'Elanna was so junior
to her carried its own set of problems.

"I'm just going to come out and say it," Kathryn told her. "As long as
we're involved, I can't promote you."

"Kathryn, since I enjoy my rank at your pleasure right now anyway,"
B'Elanna told her, "the matter's academic. It's not all that important
to me to advance in the ranks."

"It may be once we return to the Alpha Quadrant," Kathryn told her.
"It's not something to pass up lightly."

"And I don't," B'Elanna assured her. "But I'd rather have our
relationship as another pip on my collar." Kathryn leaned forward and
kissed her.

"Just so you understand when Harry is promoted to jaygee and Paris to
full lieutenant," she said. "And you aren't."

---

As time passed, and Kathryn and B'Elanna became more and more
comfortable in their relationship, they began to casually associate
publicly: eating together in the Mess Hall, to begin with, entering
the Bridge or leaving it together day after day, being seen together
in Engineering in conversation. Both were too professional to ever
shirk their duty, so that never became an issue. It was a visit to
Sandrine's one night that finally revealed the relationship beyond all
doubts. Naturally, gossip about the Captain and the Chief Engineer had
been traveling through the crew, but given the two principals, it was
kept quiet. No one wished to find him or herself before the Captain,
and certainly no one wished to arouse B'Elanna Torres' ire.

Kathryn was a little nervous, going into Sandrine's that night.
B'Elanna, beside her, was quiet. Kathryn kept telling herself that in
three years she had proven herself as Voyager's captain. If some of
the crew didn't care for her choice of partners, there wasn't a lot
they could do, short of outright insubordination, and Kathryn didn't
feel that was a strong possibility.

They found a table and sat down. Sandrine came over and Kathryn
ordered a bottle of wine for the two of them. Scattered throughout the
dim bar were several couples in intimate conversation. Kathryn had
watched them before. Now she was one of them, she reflected, with an
inward smile. She turned to B'Elanna who was idly watching the pool
game between Paris, Tuvok, Vorik and Chakotay. Kathryn slid an arm
around B'Elanna's shoulders, pulling her close. B'Elanna leaned into
her, relaxing. Sandrine brought their wine over and they sipped the
cold synthehol as they watched the pool game. Kathryn found herself
picturing B'Elanna at the pool table, naked, bending over to make a
shot. She took a hasty gulp of wine. Best not to be thinking along
those lines at the moment, or a hasty departure from the bar might
cause comment, indeed. She shifted her position and B'Elanna turned
her head to look at her.

"What's the matter?" she murmured. Kathryn choked back a laugh.

"Nothing," she said. "Nothing at all. Everything's perfect." B'Elanna
studied her for a second and then settled back down.

As the evening progressed, B'Elanna went to the pool table and played
Tuvok one on one and Kathryn challenged Chakotay to a dart game. Paris
and Kim began an arm wrestling match that drew several other crew.
Kathryn and Chakotay finished their dart game and returned to
Kathryn's table where they had a glass of wine from the bottle.

"I'm glad the crew has this place to retire to for relaxation,"
Kathryn remarked, "since this quadrant has a dearth of recreational
facilities."

"It does wonders for morale," Chakotay agreed, "but a stop at a nice
friendly planet with fresh air and friendly natives would do even
more." "Agreed," Kathryn responded. Just then Samantha Wildman came in
and Chakotay caught her attention with a wave. Kathryn noted how
Wildman's face lit up when she saw Voyager's First Officer, and
glancing at him, she saw a look of happiness on his face. Well, she
thought. Well.

Later that night as she and B'Elanna returned to quarters, Kathryn
mentioned the Chakotay/Wildman pairing. B'Elanna nodded, smiling. She
told Kathryn she'd noticed them before. They arrived at Kathryn's
quarters and entered. Inside, Kathryn swept her up into a sudden
embrace. They kissed and began removing each other's clothing, heading
for the bedroom.

"What got you so revved up in Sandrine's?" B'Elanna inquired as
Kathryn nuzzled her throat while cupping her bottom, kneading her
smooth warm flesh. B'Elanna sucked in a breath, her own hands sliding
up Kathryn's thighs.

"I was watching Chakotay and the others play pool," Kathryn answered,
and I was imagining you naked at the table with a cue in your hand,
bending over to make a shot."

"Mmmmm," B'Elanna replied as Kathryn bent her head once more to tongue
her breasts. "Playing pool naked. That might be quite a holo-program."

"Like I could keep my mind on a shot," Kathryn murmured in between
playful nips of B'Elanna's sensitive nipples, causing B'Elanna to jerk
convulsively in response.

"Yeah. I'd be thinking where I could put that cue," she said raggedly.
Her nails raked Kathryn's back and she clamped her thighs around
Kathryn. Kathryn took advantage of what that did to B'Elanna's
buttocks and slid her finger into the tight puckered opening of her
anus.

"Ahhh!" B'Elanna arched her body at Kathryn's touch. "Ohhh, Goddd,
Kathryyyn!" Her finger still busy, Kathryn moved quickly down and
plunged into B'Elanna hot wetness. B'Elanna came almost at once, but
Kathryn didn't stop until she came again. She lifted her head to look
at B'Elanna, sprawled half on and half off the bed, her legs spread
wide, her chest heaving. In a few minutes, they moved onto the bed
where B'Elanna made love to her in turn, bringing her to climax more
than once.

"You know," Kathryn murmured later, as they lay in each other's arms
later, "I think if you hadn't approached me that day on the
observation deck, we'd probably never have gotten together."

"Maybe not," B'Elanna replied, snuggling closer. "I almost didn't
speak to you."

"Fate," Kathryn said. "Fate."

---

The End