Chapter Text
"So it's back to Cascade?" Linda, the pretty veterinarian, asked the small group of men standing around her.
Jim smiled at her and bounced on his toes. "Well, actually, I thought we could all do some fishing tomorrow."
"I'm in," the vet said enthusiastically. "I'll spring for breakfast."
"Great."
Simon chuckled warily, shaking his head. "No, thank you. I think I prefer the mayhem of the city. Nice meeting you." He nodded his farewell to the young woman and headed for his car.
Blair watched the captain leave then looked back at Jim. "Uh...I think I'm down with the mayhem," he said, then quickly headed after Simon.
Simon turned to ask Blair about his plans when he saw the student walking toward him.
Jim laughed loudly. "I finally shook them."
Simon's jaw clenched when he saw Blair stumble briefly, knowing the anthropologist had heard his friend's insensitive comment. However, the younger man's voice betrayed nothing. "Hey, Simon, do you mind if I catch a ride back with you?"
"Sure, kid." The police captain slung his arm companionably around the smaller man and glared in Jim's direction, but the sentinel had already turned to finalize his fishing plans with the vet. "But I get to choose the radio station."
"No, problem, sir." Blair walked around the car and got in on the passenger side.
Oh, oh, Simon thought. Sir from the anthropologist was never a good sign.
Blair pulled his seatbelt across his body and snapped it in place, then sighed, and seemed to shrink in on himself.
"Why don't you get some rest," Simon suggested quietly. "Lord knows you've had a busy day."
"Thank you, sir," came the tired reply.
Simon pulled a cigar from his case and jammed it between his teeth, although he didn't light it in deference to the queasy stomach he was sure his companion had. Some days, he just wanted to strangle Jim Ellison.
"Sandburg." Simon opened the side door and gently shook his passenger.
"Hmm?"
"Come on, Blair."
"Five more minutes."
Simon's deep laugh caused the student to blink awake. He looked startled to find himself outside the captain's house.
"Oh man, Simon, I'm so sorry. I..."
"Was totally wasted. Don't worry about it. If the body says sleep, then it's usually best to sleep, but I really think you should come inside now. I can't have you sleeping in the driveway. People will talk."
Blair blinked owlishly up at his friend. "I...I'll call a friend to come pick me up. You need to get some rest yourself. You did every bit as much as I did and then some."
"You'll do no such thing." Simon grasped the younger man's hands and pulled him from the car, continuing to steady him until he found his feet. "Are you hungry?"
"Ummm..."
"We'll have soup. Nothing too heavy," the captain assured him as he directed the anthropologist toward the house.
"Okay."
Simon unlocked the front door, turned on the hallway light, and waited for his friend to proceed him, then guided him toward the kitchen."
"I made some chicken soup the other day. I figure we can throw some extra noodles into it if you'd like."
The student grinned cheekily at him. "You made soup...from scratch?"
"Yes, I made soup from scratch." The captain growled, daring the younger man to make something out of it.
Blair held his hands up in submission, although the grin on his face didn't fade. "You need any help?"
"No, just sit tight. Take off your jacket. Relax."
Simon puttered around the kitchen, listening to Blair's warm voice as the grad student regaled him with cooking stories. Once he put the soup on to simmer, Simon turned to face his observer. "You know, he didn't mean it the way it sounded?"
Dark blue eyes looked up and locked on his. "We both know that he did, sir."
"Sandburg...Blair...you know he can't do this sentinel thing without you."
The student remained quiet for several minutes before he spoke. "Do we?"
"This is my fault."
"How do you figure that?"
"You were content to let him go. You understood his need for privacy. If I hadn't suggested we follow Jim, you would've stayed home."
"Despite the fact that everyone calls me 'kid,' I am an adult, sir. And I did make the decision to accompany you, now didn't I?"
"I'm sorry, Sandburg."
"Don't be. It's forgotten," the student said nonchalantly, but Simon didn't believe him.
They ate their meal in silence. When they were done, Blair helped him with the dishes, moving in the same graceful dance Simon had seen him do with Jim. When had he grown so at ease with the student? Despite looking every bit like a neo-hippie flower child with time on his hands now that the Dead have broken up, Simon knew that beneath it all beat the heart of a very courageous young man who would jump out of an airplane into a dense jungle...for him. Sandburg had long since moved from observer status in his mind to one of his men, someone under his protection, someone he cared about, someone he...
He cleared his throat. "Darryl's sheets are clean. Why don't you go ahead and turn in for the night."
"That's okay, Simon. I don't want to put you out."
"Then don't make me haul your ass home when all I want to do is slip between my sheets and get a solid night's sleep."
The student looked up at him and a slow smile blossomed over his face. "Yes, sir."
Simon looked down into the warm smile and said softly, "Now that's what I like to see--obedience." Almost by their own volition his hands moved up into the younger man's silky hair.
"Simon?" Blair asked quietly, his tone confused.
"I was never going to say anything...was never going to let you know..."
Blair swallowed hard, his hands coming up to rest on the taller man's chest. "Know what?"
But Simon couldn't find the words to tell the beautiful man in front of him what he thought. Instead, he slowly lowered his head, giving the student plenty of time to move back or put a halt to the proceedings; however, Blair stood his ground.
The kiss was tender, a whisper that said everything and yet not enough.
Simon backed away, gently laying his hands over the fists clenched in his shirt. "Good night, Sandburg."
Even though he moved at a slow and deliberate pace, he couldn't help but feel like he was running away. He shook his head briefly, wondering what had possessed him to finally act on a thought he had had several times in the last couple of weeks.
He walked straight through the master bedroom and into the bathroom, making his evening ablutions at a much slower pace than normal, wishing he could rinse his mistake down the drain as easily as he had the day's dirt and sweat.
He moved back into his bedroom and stopped abruptly when he saw the anthropologist standing in the doorway, looking lost.
"Simon." Blair's whisper was heartbreaking in its intensity; in its confusion; in its need.
He should have taken the kid home. He knew that now. But looking into the wide blue eyes staring so trustingly at him, he knew he'd never have been able to do it. Sending a quick prayer to the heavens, begging for forgiveness, Simon opened his arms. Blair stumbled into his embrace and wrapped his arms around Simon's waist. Simon closed his eyes as he tightly hugged the smaller man to him. He would deal with the consequences tomorrow, but tonight he would allow himself to dream of possibilities.